For those who enjoy Jim Wright's writing, here's a commentary on something he 
saw the other day - Later, he decided the apparition must be named Snowshoe. 

Jim Wright
Thursday, August 15 at 7:12pm
Call of the Wild.

There was this ... girl in the parking lot. Maybe ... 15? 16? 14? I don't know, 
I'm not good at guessing that kind of stuff even under the best of conditions. 
Anyway, she was dressed up like a ... well, I don't know what you'd call it 
exactly, some kind of Japanese cartoon character. Anime? Cosplay? Baboon on 
blotter acid? (do they still have that stuff? LSD, not baboons). Pink hair like 
cotton candy with big fox-like ears poking through. Dirty white furry boots. 
Mini-skirt with her little ass hanging out. Little pink corset vest thingy with 
her junior high boobs smooshed out the top. Makeup and facial ornamentation 
that looked like it had been applied by a monkey with a head injury using a 
dry-wall texture-sprayer and a box of magic markers - and a nail gun, since 
she'd been violently pierced (and yes, you may take that anyway you like, it 
appears she does. But I digress). She had more chrome in her face than a 
classic flathead Harley. She was clutching a big blocky phone the way a hobo 
holds a bottle with one swallow left.

She was lip-locked with some grungy looking kid about her age, at least I think 
it was a kid. It could have been a roadkilled muskrat or one of those yappy 
little dogs that look like a mop that's been dipped in filthy water and run 
through the wringer about one too many times. He resembled nothing so much as a 
tangled ball of greasy straw-colored hair like a sullen tribble perched on top 
of a coat-rack draped willie-nilly with dirty clothes, or any random extra from 
the cast of Sid and Nancy strung out on smack and 70's East Ender punk music 
(God save the Queen, she ain't no human being Oik Oik Oik!). I couldn't really 
make out a face, just a pair of mascara-rimmed glassy black ferret-like eyes 
surrounded by pimples and metal studs. I think he was going for "tough" but he 
looked more like a diseased pekinese that had fallen into the laundry hamper at 
Marilyn Manson's house. 

I couldn't tell if they were smooching, or if they'd somehow gotten their 
various oral hardware welded together. For some reason I was reminded of those 
pictures you sometimes see in National Geographic with skeletons of wild 
animals locked in death, their horns permanently snarled together. It was ... 
disturbing, like a dog humping a Teddy bear.

On the bright side, at least I finally learned where muppets come from.

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