Dear All,
I have just had an unnerving experience. I may even
need counselling...
There was a hint of sun first thing this morning so
I decided to go to London to look at some sundials
close to the winter solstice. [Yes, I know that is
not until tomorrow but there may not be any sun
then. I am writing from England!]
All went well for a while until I set myself up in
a nice square in the City. [I daren't say exactly
where for security reasons but it was approximately
51d 30m 54.5s N and 0d 5m 58.7s W.]
I had my usual kit with me: tripod, camera, binocular,
radio-controlled watch, note-book and so on.
All was fine for about 10 minutes but I suddenly found
myself surrounded by about a dozen burly security men.
The Chief Security Man (CSM) advanced menacingly...
CSM: Can you tell us exactly what you are doing?
ME: Er yes, I'm looking at that sundial over there.
CSM: But we have been observing you taking photographs
of that building.
ME: Well yes, the sundial is on that building.
CSM: But on at least one occasion you photographed one
of my security officers.
ME: Oh yes, I remember one of them getting in the way.
CSM: Do you not appreciate that you cannot just go
around photographing buildings without arousing
suspicion?
ME: Er, this is London. Even at this time of year it is
full of tourists taking photographs of buildings.
CSM: But you are taking photographs of just one building.
ME: Well it's the only one I am interested in just now.
We continued talking nonsense like this for quite a while
when a Police Sergeant (PS) arrived on the scene. In the
end he rescued me but not without more fuss...
PS: Is there a problem.
CSM: We have been observing this man taking photographs
and making notes.
PS: Is this true?
ME: Indeed so, that's why I came here.
PS: May I look in your bag sir?
ME: Yes, here it is.
He had a good look at a collection of suspicious looking
spreadsheets and my heart sank when he spotted a large-scale
map with markings that could be interpreted as lines of fire.
Fortunately none of this seemed to worry him and he moved
down the pile to a collection of photographs of sundials.
Then my heart stopped...
PS: I see you have a photograph of the Houses of Parliament?
ME: Well it's really of the sundial in the street outside.
PS: Oh, is that what it is?
ME: Er yes, it's one of mine. Perhaps you would like to
hear about analemmatic sundials?
PS: Not today I think.
Happily he was clearly able to distinguish the ordinarily
insane from the criminally insane and he explained to the
bemused security men that he had decided that I was not
a threat.
Moreover he gave me his rank and number and said that I could
mention his name if I came again.
Phew! I'm glad he didn't search my pockets where he would
have found my Class III Laser pointer.
Frank King
Cambridge, UK
-
