Hell no I didn't read this with a straight face! Hahah! I love reading stuff
like this when I've had five hours of sleep and am feelin a little groggy
and like I've got a caffeine hang over. My favorite was:

24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos.
What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow



Life really is all about choice. This was just a damn funny way of saying
it. Hah! 

 

Thanks for sending this to us.

 

Mary Ann

 

  _____  

From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Lynn
reaper
Sent: Sunday, October 14, 2007 7:36 AM
To: talk2
Subject: The Talk2 List this is rather amusing

 

Hi all

 

My mum just sent me this.  She got it from a frend.  Don't know where the
original sender got it from, but I found it very amusing:

 

Wisdom of Larry, the Cable Guy

 

1. A day without sunshine is like night.
2. On the other hand, you have different fingers.
3. 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
4. 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name.
5. Remember, half the people you know are below average.
6. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
7. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
8. The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in
the trap.
9. Support bacteria. They're the only culture some people have.
10. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
11. Change is inevitable, except from vending machines.
12. If you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments.
13. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.
14. OK, so what's the speed of dark?
15. When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
16. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
17. How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges?
18. Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines
19. What happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
20. Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
21. Inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "What the hell
happened?"
22. Just remember -- if the world didn't suck, we would all fall off.
23. Light travels faster than sound. That's why some people appear bright
until you hear them speak.
24. Life isn't like a box of chocolates. It's more like a jar of jalapenos.
What you do today, might burn your ass tomorrow
I bet you didn't manage to read the whole of that with a straight face.

 

Lynn



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