As my wife and I both dance I get to see this issue from both sides. Remember it is generally no easier for women than men at a Milonga and generally if there is an oversupply of women as is often the case it is a lot harder for them. So you really have to respect them if they don't want to dance with you. Having said that, it is a social dance and a little kindness goes a long way mujeres :-).
After initially really resenting the cabaceo in my brief and only stint in Argentina I must say I ended up liking it a lot. I was really down on it until my wife pointed out that it was just a lovely means to allow the woman to choose who she wants to dance with. For instance, in Australia, if you go up to a follower and they want to turn you down for a dance usually they give you some sorry excuse like they have sore feet or need to rest. So in Argentina you avoid all that and furthermore once you get someone to smile and nod at you then you start to feel really special actually. Already you feel like you have shared something and she has chosen you and something great is about to start. I don't want to make it sound like some perfect solution because there are all sorts of cabaceo disasters and difficulties, but when it works it does seem to work beautifully. However I could not imagine doing it in Australia (and I imagine the rest of the world is pretty much the same), it! would probably just be ridiculous and forced out of context. Victor Bennetts -----Original Message----- From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of musette fan Sent: Friday, 5 October 2007 4:18 PM To: Tango Society of Central Illinois; Michael Cc: [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [EMAIL PROTECTED]; [email protected] Subject: Re: [Tango-L] The Jungle and Women's Tricky Tricks Thank you Ron. As a woman who strongly believes in the civility created by the use of the cabaceo, I was preparing quite the response to these issues, but you said it much more succinctly! Terri --- Tango Society of Central Illinois <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > On 10/4/07, Michael <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> wrote: > > > > On top of that, women sit together and spend so much time talking they > > give the impression they would rather talk than dance. That's their > > prerogative after all, milonga means gathering. It's just difficult to > > figure out if they want to dance. Daniel Trenner once said it's rude to > > intrude on a woman talking with her friends because it puts her on the spot > > to decide to dance -- or abandon her friend(s) in mid-sentence. > > > > Michael > > Washington, DC > > I'd rather be dancing Argentine Tango > > > > A lot of these problems would be lessened if the cabeceo were used more > outside Buenos Aires. > > This prevents men from being embarrassed about approaching a woman and being > refused a dance. > > It protects women from the social obligation of dancing with someone who > asks you but with whom you do not want to dance. > > It allows women to invite men to dance. > > Ron > > > > ----- Original Message ----- > > From: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > > To: <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> > > Cc: <[email protected]> > > Sent: Thursday, October 04, 2007 9:41 PM > > Subject: Re: [Tango-L] The Jungle and Women's Tricky Tricks > > > > > > I think what turns many guys off is not the music but the too many women > > who > > think they are too beautiful or too good to dance with one of the plain > > joes. > > The worst ones are the ones that turn a guy down claiming they are resting > > and > > then instantly pop up and start dancing with a younger or better looking > > guy. > > > > > > _______________________________________________ > > Tango-L mailing list > > [email protected] > > http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l > > > _______________________________________________ > Tango-L mailing list > [email protected] > http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l > ____________________________________________________________________________________ Need a vacation? Get great deals to amazing places on Yahoo! Travel. http://travel.yahoo.com/ _______________________________________________ Tango-L mailing list [email protected] http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l **************** CAUTION - Disclaimer ***************** This e-mail contains PRIVILEGED AND CONFIDENTIAL INFORMATION intended solely for the use of the addressee(s). If you are not the intended recipient, please notify the sender by e-mail and delete the original message. Further, you are not to copy, disclose, or distribute this e-mail or its contents to any other person and any such actions are unlawful. This e-mail may contain viruses. Infosys has taken every reasonable precaution to minimize this risk, but is not liable for any damage you may sustain as a result of any virus in this e-mail. You should carry out your own virus checks before opening the e-mail or attachment. Infosys reserves the right to monitor and review the content of all messages sent to or from this e-mail address. Messages sent to or from this e-mail address may be stored on the Infosys e-mail system. ***INFOSYS******** End of Disclaimer ********INFOSYS*** _______________________________________________ Tango-L mailing list [email protected] http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l
