Its not unusual for a follower to do something you don't expect. I try not to 
put it down to either poor leading or poor following, but it doesn't make me 
give up or not want to dance with a particular follower. They all have their 
good points :-), but some followers just need a little more assistance with 
certain steps than others. If I don't have the skills to give them more 
assistance then that is something I would need to work on.

So generally if something has not worked I just lead the same step again, but a 
little more firmly. And if it still doesn't work maybe a third time. If it 
doesn't work at that stage then there are two possibilities. The follower may 
have a certain way of doing a certain step. You can still have a nice dance if 
you just lead that one step the way the follower is expecting. But I find that 
pretty rare. In my experience usually the problem is I only led a particular 
step with people 'expecting' it before. In that case I get help from a more 
experienced dancer.

Victor Bennetts


-----Original Message-----
From: [EMAIL PROTECTED] [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] On Behalf Of Keith
Sent: Friday, 12 October 2007 3:50 AM
To: [email protected]
Subject: Re: [Tango-L] Skilled women [was: buenos aires milongas]

Of course, Jeff, I'm sure the reason couldn't possibly be your poor leading.
Personally, I've never had a woman ... "automatically resolve into an ocho".
If you want something different, Jeff, lead something different. And if you
can't - don't blame the woman.

Keith, HK


On Thu Oct 11 22:05 , Jeff Gaynor  sent:

>I actually don't really know many figures at all. I am referring to attempting
>to get, e.g., a clockwise turn that the woman doesn't automatically resolve
>into an ocho. Heck last week I had one so bad I actually tried letting go of
>her in the middle of it and she *still* did a solo ocho. I could have been
>across the room for all I could influence her.
>
>How do you politely indicate to
>someone like that they need to actually pay attention to the lead for a
>change? Women talk about a man's delicate ego but forget they have one too.
>I see tango as an interaction: I offer something and then follow how she 
>resolves it.
>If there are only a couple of resolutions women seem to know or at least 
>bother practicing
>up to any level of fluency, what to do?  I'm starting to think like Manuel and 
>just avoid
>certain women on the floor.
>
>Jeff G
>
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>Tango-L mailing list
>[email protected]
>http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l



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