----- Original Message ----
From: Carol Shepherd [EMAIL PROTECTED]
...
> It is very difficult for many women to dance comfortably while being held in 
> the small of the back, particularly if the lead pulls his arm in towards 
> himself.
 
When dancing with any woman in chest-to-chest embrace, it is very important for 
me to have full contact with my right arm, not to control but to sense my 
partner's movement better (there are those miniature muscle movements in your 
back which indicate even more what is happening than what the frontal contact 
can do on its own). I desire to envelope my partner's upper back as much as it 
is comfortable and possible given our relative body configurations.
 
When there is a big height difference (I am taller), it is not physically 
possible for me to achieve that contact with my right hand high up in the 
immediate vicinity of my partner's right shoulder blade or on it, so, out of 
necessity I move it lower to wherever it needs to go to achieve as much 
comfortable contact as possible. But, I still do not apply any pressure, so I 
really do not "hold" my partner, but rather follow her back with my arm in 
order to achieve a full contact sensation.
 
Also, if a woman is very slender, another necessity dictates me to lower my 
hand and arm -- lest I violate, what is usually considered an area reserved for 
personal, intimate hand contact only, I am sure you know what I mean.
 
...dubravko
 
===================================
seek, appreciate, and create beauty
this life is not a rehearsal
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