Hi folks, Now that I have more time, I'd thought I'd share my policy for dealing with this sensitive issue. Perhaps it will help others who need to deal with people exhibiting undesirable behavior.
The bottom line for me is this: - Does someone's repeated actions create an unhealthy learning environment for beginners? - Does it show disrespect for beginners or my invited guests? If the answer to these questions is "yes", then that person is simply not allowed to come to any of our events. Before being barred, I approach the person about his/her behavior. If the person recognizes his/her error and corrects it, then he/she is still welcome. If not, then he/she is not welcome. Most of the time, such a person avoids our events, anyway, so I've only had to bar 2 people. With all of the work I and scores of others here do to attract and make beginners feel welcome, I don't feel at all obligated to make someone with an oversized ego feel welcome at our events. I also specify beginners because this is a special group. These are people who are still learning what our community group is like and what the social norms are. With experienced dancers, I expect them to be able to set their own boundaries. Beginners, though, need time to figure out what their boundaries are. I don't announce these actions, but gossip gets around. So how does the community handle it? They usually fall into 3 groups: - those who are okay with the action, - those who are indifferent, - those who disagree with the action. Generally, people know me well enough to realize that there's always a good reason for anything I do. They also know that I have my community's best interests at heart. As far as the latter goes, they are always third-parties that have nothing to do with the incident. If they bring up issues, my response is simply that the problem doesn't involve them. If they decide to involve themselves with another person's problem, that is their own personal issue to deal with and not mine. The focus always goes back to the teaching environment. The long-term results after such incidents have been very good, both in terms of social norms and teaching. While there were short-term problems, the long-term effects have been quite positive. Where I think some community leaders fail is in simply, well, leading their communities. I think many people fall into it by default, which is what happened with me. But if one is to continue to be a community leader, then one must be willing to make decisions, take responsibility, and lead. And not be wishy-washy. By this time, you either have the trust of your community or you don't. For managing crises, the textbook case is the Tylenol scare. As this article points out, what guided the company was its mission statement written 40 years earlier. If community leaders decide on their mission statement and support it, then I think most crises can be handled fairly easily. http://iml.jou.ufl.edu/projects/Fall02/Susi/tylenol.htm Trini de Pittsburgh PATangoS - Pittsburgh Argentine Tango Society Our Mission: To make Argentine Tango Pittsburghs most popular social dance! http://patangos.home.comcast.net/ ____________________________________________________________________________________ Be a better friend, newshound, and know-it-all with Yahoo! Mobile. Try it now. http://mobile.yahoo.com/;_ylt=Ahu06i62sR8HDtDypao8Wcj9tAcJ _______________________________________________ Tango-L mailing list [email protected] http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l
