Mario wrote: > One hears a lot about how the guy has to 'take care of' the woman, provide > safe space, > listen to her, etc. etc.... what about the care and feeding of the lead???? The leader ultimately doesn't need it. He just leads. And is gracious about it. > Is it any wonder > why there are so few gus around and why they drop to the wayside one by > one???? > Usually I have found most women very encouraging as long as I was enthusiastic and polite. > Last nite, a woman remarked to me in a practica; "Move your right arm lower > you are lifting > mine!"...hmm, that's a new complaint I'm 6'1" tall and I've had it before with short women. I had my short lady instructor have to correct my technique on this so I don't repeat it. It was common of me to lift the woman up, especially on rock-step with pivot. That pulls the lady off balance/axis, makes her throw her butt backwards to recover her balance and is uncomfortable for her. I always take complaints back to my instructors to find out what to do to correct what I am doing. > and so I asked " How tall are you?" in order to file the information and > apply it where appropriate.."What does that have to do with anything?" I get > back in an incredulous, pissed-off voice Depending on the context on how and when you asked it, it could be offensive, or she could have been in a bad mood. This always a possibility and so you always have to be gracious about these things, even when they go from bad to worse. If you counter-react and can't remain gracious under any circumstance no matter how rough, you'll get a reputation other than being always gracious. > ....do I dance with her again? If she has a usually warm personality, and you are a gracious gentleman, try to repair the upset, and yes, dance with her again once you have a warm feeling for her again. > Am I stupid? > Heh - sure. But you can fix that. :-)
El Stevito de Gainesville _______________________________________________ Tango-L mailing list [email protected] http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l
