i am a teacher of tango....i teach men to lead , i do not teach on the dance floor.... I charge for lessons...I have danced and studied tango since 1998 and I know what is necessary for a woman to follow from a man who is trying to lead. the assumptions that have been made about me, my skills, my position in the tango community are incredible...what i said initially ,which was never met with a rejoinder(an answer to a reply) was this: "the man creates a space that invites the woman to move into, not pushing or shoving, but inviting" as gavito said," the lead moves the woman away from the space(position) he wants to occupy." I think this is a very sophisticated, philosophical statement of lead and follow, and no one hooked onto it...it is the essence of lead and follow, but no one related to this statement, to maul it over, chew on it, twirl it around in one's mind...people who proposed the lead/follow dillema did not relate to this concept at all...that is what leads me to think there is no communication or dialogue at all with the male members on this list with the experiences of the female dancers/followers/;philosophers/teachers/milongueras on this list. To me, this lack of "listening/relating" is a metaphor for the problems leads complain about on this list. If what is said is anytihng like what is led in the tango, no wonder there are problems for men.
One more thing: if women are as aggressive and complaining as you say they are, in criticizing your dance, you need to find new women, for that behavior is unthinkable in a proper tango community. Or if that is not the problem and no matter what you do does not please the follows, then ..maybe you should think about finding another dance, because maybe tango is not your metier....and ladies, if you do not like the way a man dances, don't dance with him, but if you accept, do not use him as whipping post to chastise his inadequicies...sherrie _______________________________________________ Tango-L mailing list [email protected] http://mailman.mit.edu/mailman/listinfo/tango-l
