Yesterday, 7 December 70 years ago, marked the Pearl Harbour attack by
the Japanese. That reminded me of our visit to the wreckage spot on
our trip to Hawaii a couple of years ago. Here is the recollection.

“Amma-Appa, there is a good a five-day-package to Hawaii. Shall I book
it for you?”  Uma, our second daughter in law, sprung a post-dinner
surprise on us. My wife was game, and she side-glanced me for my
reaction. No less keen but only a little pretentious, I signalled my
approval

“Caprios (three-fourth lengths of pants) will be comfortable for long
and beach walks, Amma. We will buy some tomorrow,” suggested Uma
moving on to the next task.

“I too shall have couple of them,” I said, not to be left behind.

“Appa, men don’t wear them,” d-i-l clarified.

“I know, I know,” I said, but I didn’t.  “I meant shorts,” I added as
a last straw.

We rang up elder son and d-i-l in Pheonix to convey the news. “So your
second honeymoon? Enjoy fully, Amma-Appa,” wished Sunita, our elder
d-i-l. In the evening, the elder son rang us up. “So Appa, all set? “

“Yes, we have bought Ready to Eat packets of Mutter Paneer, Aloo Gobi,
Pineapple Curry, Upma, Maggi. . .”

“Wait, wait, wait.  Aap khane keliye jaa rahe ho, or to see places?”
he caught me off guard. With Delhi upbringing, Hindi-English-Tamil mix
is given.

“No, no, I am coming to that. We have in place our IDs, printouts of
air and hotel reservations, clothes including our swim suits, and
sufficient cash.”

“Appa, you don’t get to visit these places everyday.  So spend
liberally. Look at the product, not the price. AND DON'T CONVERT.
Carry minimum cash. Use either of the add-on credit cards that Sridhar
and I have given you both,” he reinforced what the younger son had
insisted on us separately. The younger one’s briefing included, inter
alia, a practical demonstration to me on how to focus, zoom and click
the camera, so that at the end of the trip the snaps are not Appa,
Appa and APPA all the way; Amma does feature in some of them.

In Honolulu we walked to the beach, and spent hours at waist-deep
water. Since she didn’t know how to swim, she clutched my hand as a
predator his prey in Animal Planet. Each time the tides swept us to
the shore, her joy and excitement would beat hollow those of our
grandchildren, all below six, had they been around.

On the first day it was to Pearl Harbor where the Japanese army made
an unprovoked air attack and destroyed many US warships in 1941. At
the end of the day’s trip, the Guide said that as a memento one should
take from Hawaii not pineapples, papayas, or mangos that the island
abounds in, but pearls and gems; and drove us to a designated shop.
Unfortunately the guy targeting us mistook us for the uncle and aunt
of Mukesh Ambani. He showed us pieces in the range of $ 2500-3500.
When he saw us move on, he announced impromptu 50% discount. Marketing
gimmicks are the same everywhere, I said silently.

It was a different guide on day two; he was matter of fact in his
English presentation, but regaled his audience in Chinese. Later at my
request he did his best to make the English version equally humorous.
But jokes in one’s own mother tongue carry a special flavor, after
all.

Driving us past one beautiful beach after the other, he asked us to
guess the cost of the house facing these beaches. Each one shouted his
price, as though bidding in an auction. But everyone was far off the
mark.  Pointing to a house that was a replica of a submarine he said
that was owned by the person who manufactured submarines for the
country – the filthy rich only could afford, in other words.

After a few miles, we were in the midst of volcanic mountains on one
side, and natural sea beach on the other. The lava-remains stood
testimony to the volcanic havocs. Legend has it that bad luck would
befall if one took these lavas home. The Iranian lady from the group
collected several, nevertheless.

“Do you wish to own a house and live near this natural beach?” Terry
asked us as we passed through yet another breathtaking natural beach.
“Yes,” many responded ahead of the other, as though it was a
first-come-first-served. “I am afraid you can’t, because only those
who have no income can stay in this vicinity, and the State provides
them subsidy,” he clarified.

“Because of poverty,” he continued, “there is a lot of stealing.  Many
tourists have lost their camcods, cameras or handbags.”   Pretty damn
quick, everyone checked his belongings thoroughly, and held his
backpack more firmly to his chest.

Every evening there was a Hawaiian song and dance programme at an open
place in the midst of the shopping complex. To set the stage and to
remind us of how the native Hawaii inhabitants enjoyed their late
evenings in the good old pre-electricity days, the streets were lit up
with something similar to what we see during the temple-festival
processions in the South where the big oil-soaked cloth balls burn
stuck on top of long trident rods. (I don’t get the right word for it,
but it is called “Tee Pandham” in Tamil or Malayalam, or both).

On return, Sridhar and Uma took us straight to Bombay Gardens for a
45-item buffet (that includes the forbidden non-vegetarian also)
followed by buying me a pair of high-end jeans and an exclusive golfer
T-shirt in advance celebration of my birthday when he would be in
China.

I rang up my elder son in Phoenix. D-i-l picked it up. She lost no
time to add: “Appa, don’t buy sunglasses, postpone it for the Phoenix
visit. Fortunately she didn't add a scarf; that would have completed
the costume of a Tamil villain’s sidekick.

At bed, sleep still eluding me, I told my wife, “I think our children,
SSSU (Shankar-Sunita, Sridhar-Uma), are taking very good care of us,
aren’t they?  “Yes, no doubt about it,” she responded, although this
particular purchase in no way enriched her wardrobe.

V.V. Sundaram
08 December 2011

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