Sir
A season of grieving may be necessary, but a lifetime of grieving isn’t
1 Grieving provides us appropriate channels for expressing and
processing our loss, thereby gradually freeing our consciousness from
emotional clogging. If without being given time to grieve, we are told to
resume life immediately as if nothing has changed, we won’t be able to
function. Hence grieving is an act of the mind and also serves as a
medicine to ponder over one’s strength and the weakness especially when
being aloof and under the dark-silence.
A season for grieving (now > 8 months) can be a valid need for emotional
healing. However, we may unwittingly aggravate our emotional wounds by
letting the loss replay endlessly in our minds, thereby sentencing
ourselves to a lifetime of grieving. Such holding on to distressful stimuli
characterizes determination in the mode of ignorance
2 Chap 18 *TEXT 35 Bhagavat Gita*
*yayā svapnaṁ bhayaṁ śokaṁ viṣādaṁ madam eva ca*
*na vimuñcati durmedhā dhṛtiḥ sā pārtha tāmasī*
* And that determination which cannot go beyond dreaming, fearfulness,
lamentation, moroseness, and illusion-such unintelligent determination is
in the mode of darkness.*
3 *குறள் 360 <https://www.ytamizh.com/thirukural/kural-360/>: **காமம்*
*வெகுளி* *மயக்கம்* *இவ்மூன்றன்* *நாமம்* *கெடக்கெடும்* *நோய்**. :*
*விருப்பு**, **வெறுப்பு**, **அறியாமை* *ஆகிய* *இக்* *குற்றங்கள்* *மூன்றனுடைய*
*பெயரும்* *கெடுமாறு* *ஒழுகினால்* *துன்பங்கள்* *வராமற்* *கெடும்**.* English
Couplet 360: When lust and wrath and error's triple tyranny is o'er, their
very names for aye extinct, then pain shall be no more. Explanation: If
the very names of these three things, desire, anger, and confusion of mind,
be destroyed, then will also perish the evils (which flow from them).
(Tamil to English): kaamam vekuLi mayakkam ivmoondran naamam kedakketum
noai // How can we avoid unhealthily prolonging our grief? By redefining
ourselves spiritually. We are relational creatures; we define ourselves in
terms of our most important relationships. Once this relationship becomes
our defining identity, we see our other relationships in perspective.
4 B G Chapter 2: TEXT 11: *asocyan anvasocas tvam prajna-vadams ca
bhasase nanusocanti panditah * you are mourning for what is not worthy
of grief. Those who are wise lament not.
Bhaja Govindam by Adi Sankara: नलिनीदलगतजलमतितरलं तद्वज्जीवितमतिशयचपलम्
विद्धि व्याध्यभिमानग्रस्तंलोकं शोकहतं च समस्तम् ॥ 4॥ The life of a person
is as uncertain as rain drops trembling on a lotus leaf. Know that the whole
world remains a prey to disease, ego and grief.
दिनयामिन्यौ सायं प्रातः शिशिरवसन्तौ पुनरायातः । कालः क्रीडति गच्छत्यायु-
स्तदपि न मुञ्चत्याशावायुः ॥ 12॥ Daylight and darkness, dusk and dawn,
winter and springtime come and go. Time plays and life ebbs away. But the
storm of desire never leaves.
*5 குறள் 621 <https://www.ytamizh.com/thirukural/kural-621/>: **இடுக்கண்*
*வருங்கால்* *நகுக* *அதனை* *அடுத்தூர்வது* *அஃதொப்ப* *தில்**.:*
*துன்பம்* *வரும்போது** (**அதற்காக* *கலங்காமல்**) **sirithal **வேண்டும்**, *
*அத்துன்பத்தை* *எதிர்த்து* *வெல்லவல்லது* *அதைப்* *போன்றது* *வேறு* *இல்லை**.
*English Couplet 621: Smile, with patient, hopeful heart, in troubles hour;
Meet and so vanquish grief; nothing hath equal power.Couplet Explanation:
If troubles come, *laugh;* there is nothing like that, to press upon and
drive away sorrow. (Tamil to English): idukkaN varungaal nakuka adhanai
atuththoorvadhu aqdhoppa thil.
6 Hence these effects are not new to this earth; may be new to us; it was
there; it is now in the present; and it shall be there in the future too. K
R IRS 161120
On Mon, 16 Nov 2020 at 08:24, 'Rangarajan T.N.C.' [email protected]
[Thatha_Patty] <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>
> https://hbr.org/2020/03/that-discomfort-youre-feeling-is-grief
>
> We feel the world has changed, and it has. We know this is temporary, but
> it doesn’t feel that way, and we realize things will be different. Just as
> going to the airport is forever different from how it was before 9/11,
> things will change and this is the point at which they changed. The loss of
> normalcy; the fear of economic toll; the loss of connection. This is
> hitting us and we’re grieving. Collectively. We are not used to this kind
> of collective grief in the air.
>
> There’s denial, which we say a lot of early on: *This virus won’t affect
> us*. There’s anger: *You’re making me stay home and taking away my
> activities. *There’s bargaining: *Okay, if I social distance for two
> weeks everything will be better, right?* There’s sadness: *I don’t know
> when this will end. *And finally there’s acceptance. *This is happening;
> I have to figure out how to proceed.*
>
> Acceptance, as you might imagine, is where the power lies. We find control
> in acceptance. *I can wash my hands. I can keep a safe distance. I can
> learn how to work virtually.*
>
>
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