GOOD JOKES 3-2024-02 JOKE 1
POSTED BY Louis Gabriel, 4h Two rednecks decided that they weren't going anywherein life and thought they should go to college to get ahead. The first went in to see the counsellor, who told himto take math, history, and logic. "What's logic?" the redneck asked. The professor answered, "Let me give you anexample. Do you own a lawn mower?" "I sure do." "Then I can assume, using logic, that you have ayard," replied the professor. "That's real good!" said the redneck. The professor continued, "Logic will also tellme that since you have a yard, you own a house." Impressed, the redneck said, "Amazing!" "And since you own a house, logic dictates thatyou have a wife." "That's Betty Mae! This is incredible!" The redneck was catching on. "Finally, since you have a wife, logically I canassume that you are heterosexual," said the professor. "You're absolutely right! Why that's the mostfascinatin' thing I ever heard! I cain't wait to take that logic class!" The redneck, proud of the new world opening up tohim, walked back into the hallway where his friend was still waiting. "So whatclasses are ya takin'?" asked the friend. "Math, history, and logic!" replied thefirst redneck. "What the heck is logic?" asked his friend. "Let me give you an example. Do ya own a lawnmower?" asked the first redneck. "No," his friend replied. "You're bachelor ain't ya?" JOKE 2 Posted by, Davide Fiore,1y Wrong Number! On his first day on the job, the trainee dialled thekitchen and shouted into the phone: “Get me a cupof coffee, quickly!” The voice from the other side responded: “You fool,you’ve dialled the wrong extension! Do you know who you’re talking to?” “No,” repliedthe trainee. “It’s the Managing Director ofthe company, idiot!” The trainee shouted back: “And do you know who Youare talking to, you idiot?” “No!” repliedthe Managing Director indignantly. “Thank god for that!” replied thetrainee and slammed down the phone. JOKE 3 Posted by AndrasLu 7mo The Pope want to go from Rome to Frascati in hislimousine. The Pope says to the driver: "Dear chauffeur, you are doing anexcellent job, but Ihaven't driven a car for 4 years. Would you please let me drive? I'd really be up forit now." The chauffeur agrees and swaps into the back of the car. The Pope speeds through Rome and soon enough they seethe police with flashing lights in the rear-view mirror. He pulls over. Thepoliceman approaches, looks through the window, turns around, and calls hissuperior. Police officer:"Mr. police director, I stopped a very important person, what should I do?" The police director: "How important? Themayor?" Policeman: "No, more important." The police director: "Oh yeah? Don’ say it isMr. Berlusconi?" Policeman: "No, no, more important." The police director: "What? Is it someinternational celebrity?" Policeman: "No, much more important." The police director swallows: "Okay, who is itthen!?" Policeman: "I really don't know, but he's being driven by the Popehimself!" JOKE 4 Posted by Astrid Delacruz,2h A man walks into a vegetable stand and sees a signthat says, "TalkingCarrots - $10 each." Intrigued, he asks the farmer about thetalking carrots. The farmer explains, "These are special carrotsthat can answer any question you ask them." The man is skeptical but decides to try it out. Hepicks up a carrot and asks, "What's the capital of France?"The carrotreplies, "Paris!" Impressed, the man asks another question, "Whowon the World Series in 1995?" The carrot confidently answers, "The AtlantaBraves!" The man buys a few talking carrots and rushes home toshow his family. Excitedly, he says, "Look, I bought these amazing talking carrots!" His wife looks unimpressed and says, "You paid$10 each for those? You couldhave just bought an encyclopedia!" JOKE 5 Posted by Rebecca C.1y A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to awoman, and ordered a glass of champagne. The woman perked up and said, “How about that? I justordered a glass of champagne, too!” “What acoincidence,” the farmer said. “This is a special day for me; I am celebrating.” “This is aspecial day for me too, I am also celebrating,” said the woman. “What a coincidence!” said the farmer. As theyclinked glasses, he added, “What are you celebrating?” “My husbandand I have been trying to have a child, and today my gynecologist told me that I am pregnant!” “What acoincidence!” said the man. “I’m a chicken farmer, and for years all of my henswere infertile, but today they are all laying fertilized eggs.” “That’sgreat!” said the woman, “How did your chickens become fertile?” “I used a different rooster,” hereplied. The woman smiled, clinked his glass and said, “What acoincidence!” -- You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Thatha_Patty" group. To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to [email protected]. To view this discussion on the web visit https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/thatha_patty/1615986068.1885000.1711774956291%40mail.yahoo.com.
