Sometimes no matter what we do, we may feel that inner peace is not
possible.

Unexpected complications may arise at any moment, on any given day. And
regardless of how hard we may try to dodge them, if they’re meant to
strike, they will strike.

When our life suddenly turns upside down, we may feel angry—at someone, at
the world, or even at ourselves—for many different reasons. Even if our
anger is silent or dormant, it can—and will—hurt us.

In Buddhism, anger is one of the three poisons that are the primary causes
of our suffering on Earth. If we look closely at our mental and emotional
state when we’re consumed by anger, we can clearly spot that the feelings
associated with anger are indeed poisonous—and detrimental.

krodhad bhavati sammohah sammohat smriti-vibhramah

smriti-bhranshad buddhi-nasho buddhi-nashat pranashyati  B G 2.63

BG 2.63: Anger leads to clouding of judgment, which results in bewilderment
of memory. When memory is bewildered, the intellect gets destroyed; and
when the intellect is destroyed, one is ruined.

தன்னைத்தான் காக்கின் சினங்காக்க காவாக்கால்

தன்னையே கொல்லுஞ் சினம். ஒருவன் தன்னைத்தான் காத்துக் கொள்வதானால் சினம்
வராமல் காத்துக் கொள்ள வேண்டும், காக்கா விட்டால் சினம் தன்னையே அழித்து
விடும்.

Thannaiththaan Kaakkin Sinangaakka Kaavaakkaal

Thannaiye Kollunj Chinam

Thyself to save, from wrath away! If not thyself the wrath will slay

If a man would guard himself, let him guard against anger; if he do not
guard it, anger will kill him

“Anger can never remove anger; anger can only promote more anger.” ~ Thich
Nhat Hanh

According to Buddhism, we may feel the urge to punish the people who have
caused our anger because we may not know how to handle the overwhelming
emotions that anger perpetuates within us.

But maybe if we learn what we can do with our anger, we may be able to
decrease our suffering and the suffering of others.

If you want to tame your temper—Buddhist-style—ask yourself the following
questions:

1. Can I accept that I am responsible for my anger?

It’s true that external factors may trigger our anger, but how we choose to
handle it is entirely up to us. I know it’s hard to take responsibility for
such a complicated mental state, but if we can accept that we’re the only
ones who are responsible for our emotions, we can take the necessary steps
to rightfully cope with them. When we understand that our relief is not in
someone else’s hands, we naturally calm down and work on finding peace
within.

2. Am I willing to find the roots of my anger?

It’s not easy to identify the roots of our anger, but when and if we do, it
becomes easier to identify the external triggers in the future and learn to
cope with them before or when they arise. We need to acknowledge as well
the roots that are within us and examine what’s hindering us from
practicing mindfulness instead of jumping into hatred, blame, and fear. So
sit with the tension and see where the aggression is coming from.

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3. Will it matter 10 years from now?

Genuinely ask yourself if the event that’s upsetting you right now will
matter in five, 10, or 15 years. It most probably won’t, so obsessing over
it here and now is pointless. Think that a decade from now you might not
even remember the details of the event or the faces of those involved. That
thought alone should be able to calm you down right away.

4. How is my anger helping me?

Chances are it’s not helping you at all. When we’re in the midst of an
outrageous situation, it’s easy to lose sight of what’s really important.
And what’s important is learning how to cultivate compassion and
loving-kindness toward ourselves and all beings, especially when

K Rajaram IRS 4824

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