FROM THE BOOK HOW TO SAY “NO” No one will protect my time or prioritize my needs as vigilantly as me.
We have a limited number of hours to play with each day. That means every time we say yes to someone, we're saying no to someone or something else. And every time we say no, we free ourselves to spend that time and attention on another person or interest. Self-care isn't selfish. It's necessary. The problem is, if you're constantly saying yes to other people, putting their priorities ahead of your own, you won't have the time or energy to care for yourself. And you'll slowly become irritated, cynical, and miserable. The most responsible thing you can do is care for yourself before you cater to others. Burdened with a low self-image, we mistakenly believe our time is worth less than others' time. We wrongly assume our goals and interests are inferior to other people's goals and interests. We perceive our value to the world as somehow less than the value offered by those around us. The good news is that saying no can actually improve your sense of self-worth. The more you do it, the more you'll come to realize that your time, commitments, and aspirations are just as important as those of the requestor. Helping people is a respectable thing to do. But helping people for the wrong reasons will only reinforce a bad habit that'll eventually cause you to feel bitter and resentful. Many folks have difficulty saying no because they struggle with conflict anxiety. They loathe confrontation and will do just about anything to avoid it. The problem is, capitulating to avoid conflict reinforces the idea that your feelings are less important than those of the other person. The reality is, they're not less important. You're just being made to feel that way. Recognize that harmony isn't always possible. People have conflicting opinions, needs, and desires. Friction is inevitable. it's possible to decline requests without saying the word "no." It's just a matter of finding different ways to communicate the same message. Accept that many opportunities seem promising, but are a waste of time and energy. You probably know this from experience. When your inner opportunist rears its head, have the courage to say no, even if doing so means you might miss out. If you want to learn to say no with confidence and without guilt, it's vital that you set emotional boundaries. You must avoid feeling responsible for others' feelings and absolve yourself as the cause of their negative reactions. When you say no to someone, courtesy and assertiveness work hand in hand. You'll find that being courteous will encourage people to perceive you as respectful, compassionate, and attentive. Remind yourself that your friend's dismay and anger upon hearing you say no isn't your problem. You've done your part as long as you turn him or her down graciously, sincerely, and with respect. KR IRS 23425 ---------- Forwarded message --------- From: Jambunathan Iyer <n.jambun...@gmail.com> Date: Wed, 23 Apr 2025 at 05:11 Subject: Thought for the Day 23rd April 2025 To: Rajaram Krishnamurthy <keyarinc...@gmail.com>, YM - markandeya101091 < markandeya101...@gmail.com>, SRIRAMAJAYAM <vabal...@gmail.com>, Sridhar Srinivasan(Sanadhana Gmail) <sridhsriniva...@gmail.com>, Yeddanapudi Markandeyulu <yeddanapu...@yahoo.co.in>, Rama (Iyer 123 Group) < kaviran...@gmail.com>, ARR <arranganathan.ba...@gmail.com>, Chittanandam V R <chittananda...@gmail.com>, venkat giri <venkat_...@yahoo.co.in>, gopala krishnan <gopa4...@yahoo.in>, N. Sekar <nseka...@yahoo.com> People of character do the right thing, not because they think it will change the world but because they refuse to be changed by the world.... N Jambunathan Rengarajapuram-Kodambakkam-Chennai-Mob:9176159004 *" What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals. If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal, not to people or things "* -- You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Thatha_Patty" group. To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to thatha_patty+unsubscr...@googlegroups.com. To view this discussion visit https://groups.google.com/d/msgid/thatha_patty/CAL5XZoqt%2Bx29Wa4ac7zGrPZ5On3N0-Ts%2BPodktQ_7ahrThiORw%40mail.gmail.com.
