Free-Reprint Article Written by: Kathy Stafford See Terms of Reprint Below.
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Additional Article Information: =============================== 685 Words; formatted to 65 Characters per Line Distribution Date and Time: 2007-11-13 13:00:00 Written By: Kathy Stafford Copyright: 2007, All Rights Reserved Contact Email: mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] Kathy Stafford's Picture URL: http://www.dearkathy.com/images/kls_article_photo.gif For more free-reprint articles by Kathy Stafford, please visit: http://www.thePhantomWriters.com/recent/author/kathy-stafford.html ============================================= Special Notice For Publishers and Webmasters: ============================================= If you use this article on your website or in your ezine, We Want To Know About It. Use the following URL to let us know where you have used this article, and we will include a link to your website on thePhantomWriters.com: http://thephantomwriters.com/notify.php?id=5417&p=load HTML Copy-and-Paste and TEXT Copy-and-Paste Versions Of Article Are Available at: http://thePhantomWriters.com/free_content/db/s/talking-about-past-relationships.shtml#get_code --------------------------------------------------------------------- Talking About Past Relationships Copyright (c) 2007 Kathy Stafford, All Rights Reserved Dear Kathy http://www.dearkathy.com Many men have experienced the deadly double-edged sword of having their new girlfriend ask them about their old girlfriends. When confronted with this situation, men will find themselves on dangerous ground. After all, the new girlfriend will ask about an old girlfriend, but the rules can quickly change on him. The next thing a guy knows, he's totally on the receiving end of a cold shoulder. Let's be honest here even though girls will say that they don't want to hear about your old girlfriends, there is a part of them that is actually quite curious. They have a desire to find out how they "measure up" compared to your past girlfriends, but they're never going to come right out and ask you about her. Instead, they're going to go the roundabout way of asking something as innocent as "So, did you bring Jessica to this restaurant when you dated her?" The question sounds innocent enough, but be careful. They are really trying to find out about your previous relationship. You're going to sit there, completely caught off-guard. It's not out of the realm of possibility that you're going to be faced with your girlfriend wanting to know the more intimate details of your past girlfriends, too. They'll want to know general information such as "How many girlfriends have you had?" and they'll also want to know specific information, too "Did you and Jessica do this or did she let you do this?" Keep in mind that your new girlfriend is going to tell you that she wants to know the answer to these questions, but she's never going to tell you just how much she wants to know. In fact, you're not even going to know just how much information she wants until you've given her too much. At that time she'll be quite clear as to how much she didn't want that knowledge. Some men have found themselves in the dangerous arena of dating a new girlfriend's friend in the past. This is going to make your new girlfriend very curious. If you're caught in this area it can be very hazardous. Just make sure that you don't say anything that isn't true just to get you off the hook, such as, "I broke up with her because she was cheating on me." Your new girlfriend might well have found out that the friend dumped you because you were flirting with her cousin! Instead, just give out minimal information and nothing more than that. Be short and straight with your answers. Don't give out more information than you have to. Under no circumstances do you want to bring up the subject of old girlfriends if your new girlfriend hasn't brought it up first. This means that you don't mention that you've been to a certain location in the past, because that reminds her that she isn't the only girl you've ever dated (she knows this, but don't remind her) and it also shows that you remember your old girlfriend's name and that you were in that location with her. While she knows you've dated other women, she doesn't like to be reminded and she certainly doesn't want to think that you remember those other girlfriends. Also, make sure that all photos and memorabilia from other past relationships are removed from public view. Your new girlfriend does not need to come into your apartment and see traces of your past girlfriends all over the place, or she'll decide that you haven't gotten over this girlfriend and that'll be the end of it. In the end, just take the lead from your girlfriend as to how much information to divulge. Give her what she's looking for but nothing more than that. A good rule of thumb is to keep in mind how much you really want to know about her past boyfriends. Too much information can be a bad thing especially in the beginning of a relationship, when insecurity is running high. Let the relationship move into more solid territory before getting into the past and keep it light and short. --------------------------------------------------------------------- Kathy Stafford, Relationship Coach, I show singles how to get married and couples how to STAY married Do you want more from your relationship? Go to http://www.dearkathy.com for relationship articles, advice, and programs. Get Kathys new book, Relationship Remorse: Mistakes Women Make When Shopping for a Man. and learn the right way to find a loving and committed life-partner. Order the book at http://www.relationshipremorse.com Copyright © 2007 Kathy Stafford / dearkathy.com. All rights reserved. --- END ARTICLE --- Get HTML or TEXT Copy-and-Paste Versions Of This Article at: http://thePhantomWriters.com/free_content/db/s/talking-about-past-relationships.shtml#get_code ..................................... 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