BREAKING NEWS! WHITE HOUSE READIES NEW EXECUTIVE ORDER.  In the boldest move to date, Pres. Bush is readying an executive order which will change the face of American higher education. The order will completely revise the present system tenure for University faculties. Any American College or University receiving federal funds for any purpose whatsoever will be required to demand that its faculty members sign an oath in support of the U.S. Patriot Act. Once that this new program is successfully under way, there are plans to extend the oath demand to graduate students.

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