Laura- I suspect that your friend has a small problem with 'small talk'.
I admit it is something whose intricacies have often flown by me;
mocking me as they go. There are several examples of self-help books on
this topic. I'd just tell your friend to look through Borders, B&N or
other local bookstore and find one - I usually look through them while
sipping a cup of coffee. A few suggestions on evaluating credentials are
all they'd need from you (usually listed on the back or inside jacket).
He/she may just need a few skills on ending conversations- I find that
most people get it if you say something more obvious like, "Yikes- look
at the time"! or "Sorry- got to run". As to the second question- that's
a puzzler for the poly-sci folks, imho. It is akin to the question of
why so many people who dislike people decide to go into business- bad
judgment is as good a reason as any I'm aware of. :) Tim

_________________________________________________
Timothy O. Shearon, PhD
Albertson College of Idaho
2112 Cleveland Blvd. 
Caldwell, ID 83605

[EMAIL PROTECTED]
teaching: History and systems; Intro to Neuropsychology; Child
Development; Physiological Psychology; Psychology and Cinema


-----Original Message-----
From: Laura Valvatne [mailto:[EMAIL PROTECTED] 
Sent: Tuesday, April 27, 2004 10:10 AM
To: Teaching in the Psychological Sciences
Subject: "He Talks Too Much"

Hello Tipsters,

A 60-year-old male who works for the U.S. Department of Agriculture  
sent me the following letter. I would appreciate any thoughts you have 
before I reply.  


"Would you be able to recommend to me some reading material about a
couple of topics that I've pondered about for a long time, but haven't
come up with any answers. Maybe even a class at the College that would
enlighten me.

1- What is it about some folks, both at work and in my personal life,
that just plain talk too much. They will even follow me to keep talking,
its not lecturing type talk, its just talk about things. Often one topic
just drifts in to another. Its usually about their life in some manner,
about their kids or their experiences.

Is there something I should be doing? Are they looking for some kind of
feedback? What in the world causes such things? The folks that I'm
referring to seem to have a pretty high view of themselves and their
experiences.

2- What causes some folks to be so secretive about things? I realize
that there is a view that knowledge is power, and some folks try to use
even the simplest piece of information as a means of control, if they
think that you might want that information. Why would someone expect an
enterprise to be successful if they are at the head of the enterprise
and insist upon being secretive about most things?"

Thank you for your help,
Laura

Laura Valvatne, Ph.D.
Psychology
Shasta College
11555 Old Oregon Trail
Redding, CA 96049

530-225-4954
[EMAIL PROTECTED]


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