OK, so here's another 2 cents from me, whether anybody wants it or not. Last year, at almost exactly this time (right around Thanksgiving), my oldest daughter nearly died. I won't repeat the details, but she ended up being hospitalized in a university hospital about an hour away. Because she wasn't expected to live, and because, as I said before, family is the #1 priority (to me, anyway), I was beside her hospital bed every day for 6 long weeks. My students were well aware of what happened and they all knew that their final grades would be late in coming. They were all--every single student--fine with it. In fact, the cards, letters, prayers, and good wishes from students (and even their parents) were overwhelming. One of my students (a nontraditional student) and his wife drove out to the hospital one evening during all of this to bring my family the dinner they had made us. The point is, some reasons ARE viable, and if you expect your students to be adults, you treat them as adults. Sick kids are an excuse in my book. So is the dog dying. But it really doesn't matter to me what the excuse is, what matters is how the student prioritizes it. I don't know what is going on in each student's life and what their own personal problems are. Some of them are pretty darned tough. Two weeks ago I drove my daughter to Houston so she could wait for a donor heart. I thought I had everything covered and I told my students I would be in touch with them via e-mail. I didn't anticipate totalling my daughter's brand new car. But I did and even though we were fine, it changed our itinerary. My students understood why I didn't get their tests graded right away and homework handed back when I had intended. And I try to understand when things happen to them. Yes, shit happens. Unbelievable shit sometimes. And I can't ever know for sure whether my students are being honest with me--things might not be as bad as they claim--or things might be much worse. I believe that each and every person who thinks he or she will always get to class on time (prof or student) and will always get the paper/test/homework handed in/graded promptly is either darned lucky so far or living in some other universe. And sometimes I have to leave things until the last minute and I'm fine with it--as long as the consequences of leaving it go are better than the consequences of doing it right away in lieu of something else. A case in point: I would never keep teaching a class if I even halfway thought I might be having a heart attack. Carol
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