This one even has redeeming psychological content of an educational sort, 
as I first told it in a behaviour modification class. It subsequently 
became a classic family favourite, so scandalized and yet titillated were 
my two young daughters to hear their father use such naughty words. I 
hope it gets through your filth filters.

--------------------

The parents can no longer stand the potty-mouth of their fresh 
adolescent. They consult a behaviour modifier. He explains about operant 
conditioning and the use of time-out. They agree to give it a try.  

The family sit down for supper that night. 

Potty-mouth adolescent son: Hey sis, pass some of them f*cken carrots, 
will ya?

Father (calmly): Sorry, son. Up to your room. Now. Five minutes!

Son (whines): Why? Whud I do?

Father: Never mind. Just go to your room. We'll call you when you're 
ready.

Five minutes pass. Son returns to the table.

Son: Mom! Can I have some o' them God-d*amned carrots now?

Father: Son! Up to your room.
.................

Two more repetitions follow. Son returns to the table.

Father (leans over solicitiously): Is there anything I can get for you, 
son?

Son: You can bet your sweet ass it ain't goina be them f*cken carrots 
this time!
---------------------------

Moral for behaviour modification class: Verbal instructions are not 
necessary for operant conditioning to work (as, for example conditioning 
of animals and infants show). But they can make the process more 
efficient.

Stephen

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Stephen L. Black, Ph.D.          
Professor of Psychology, Emeritus   
Bishop's University      e-mail:  [email protected]
2600 College St.
Sherbrooke QC  J1M 1Z7
Canada

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