>>From a little book called "Disorder in the Court."  Real
court
>>>transcriptions,  word for word.
>>>
>>>Q:  What is your date of birth?
>>>A:  July fifteenth.
>>>Q:  What year?
>>>A:  Every year.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
>>>A:  Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  This myasthenia gravis -- does it affect your memory at
all?
>>>A:  Yes.
>>>Q:  And in what ways does it affect your memory?
>>>A:  I forget.
>>>Q:  You forget.  Can you give us an example of something that
>>>    you've forgotten?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  How old is your son -- the one living with you.
>>>A:  Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
>>>Q:  How long has he lived with you?
>>>A:  Forty-five years.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  What was the first thing your husband said to you when he
>>>    woke that morning?
>>>A:  He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
>>>Q:  And why did that upset you?
>>>A:  My name is Susan.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  And where was the location of the accident?
>>>A:  Approximately milepost 499.
>>>Q:  And where is milepost 499?
>>>A:  Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Sir, what is your IQ?
>>>A:  Well, I can see pretty well, I think.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Did you blow your horn or anything?
>>>A:  After the accident?
>>>Q:  Before the accident.
>>>A:  Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school
>>>    for it.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved
>>>    in the voodoo or occult?
>>>A:  We both do.
>>>Q:  Voodoo?
>>>A:  We do.
>>>Q:  You do?
>>>A:  Yes, voodoo.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your
>>>    red and blue lights flashing?
>>>A:  Yes.
>>>Q:  Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her
car?
>>>A:  Yes, sir.
>>>Q:  What did she say?
>>>A:  What disco am I at?
>>>
>>>
>>>Recently reported in the Massachusetts Bar Association
Lawyers
>>>journal, the following are questions actually asked of
witnesses
>>>by attorneys during trials and, in certain cases, the
responses
>>>given by insightful witnesses:
>>>
>>>Q:  Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his
>>>    sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Were you present when your picture was taken?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Was it you or your younger brother who was killed in the
war?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Did he kill you?
>>>
>>>
>>> Q:  How far apart were the vehicles at the time of the
collision?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  You were there until the time you left, is that true?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  How many times have you committed suicide?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
>>>A:  Yes.
>>>Q:  And what were you doing at that time?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  She had three children, right?
>>>A:  Yes.
>>>Q:  How many were boys?
>>>A:  None.
>>>Q:  Were there any girls?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  You say the stairs went down to the basement?
>>>A:  Yes.
>>>Q:  And these stairs, did they go up also?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon,
didn't you?
>>>A:  I went to Europe, Sir.
>>>Q:  And you took your new wife?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  How was your first marriage terminated?
>>>A:  By death.
>>>Q:  And by whose death was it terminated?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Can you describe the individual?
>>>A:  He was about medium height and had a beard.
>>>Q:  Was this a male, or a female?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a
deposition
>>>    notice which I sent to your attorney?
>>>A:  No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead
people?
>>>A:  All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  All your responses must be oral, OK?  What school did you
go to?
>>>A:  Oral.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
>>>A:  The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
>>>Q:  And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
>>>A:  No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing
an
>>>    autopsy.
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
>>>
>>>
>>>Q:  You were not shot in the fracas?
>>>A:  No, I was shot midway between the fracas and the navel
>>>
>>>
>>>AND SAVING THE BEST FOR LAST:
>>>
>>>Q:  Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check
for a
>>>    pulse?
>>>A:  No.
>>>Q:  Did you check for blood pressure?
>>>A:  No.
>>>Q:  Did you check for breathing?
>>>A:  No.
>>>Q:  So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when
you began
>>>    the autopsy?
>>>A:  No.
>>>Q:  How can you be so sure, Doctor?
>>>A:  Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
>>>Q:  But could the patient have still been alive nevertheless?
>>>A:  It is possible that he could have been alive and
practicing law
>>>    somewhere.




Rip Pisacreta, Ph.D.
Professor, Psychology,
Ferris State University
Big Rapids, MI 49307
email: [EMAIL PROTECTED]


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