And my cat's fur is so so soooo beautiful, I'd cry if I weren't giggling. On Sep 13, 2012, at 5:01 PM, Beth Benoit <[email protected]> wrote:
> > > > > > > And don't you love the shape of the pen? > > Beth Benoit > > On Thu, Sep 13, 2012 at 5:58 PM, Jim Matiya <[email protected]> wrote: > > > > > > > > > > Dude, > Parenting is cool.... > > From: [email protected] > Date: Thu, 13 Sep 2012 17:11:02 -0400 > Subject: [tips] Can pot make you a better parent? > To: [email protected] > > > > > > This appeared in the New York Times recently, and I found myself reading it > to my (now adult - and parents!) children. It's hilarious, but also may give > some food for thought about all of the ways of looking at parenting. (Just > in case you can't access it, I cut and pasted it below my signature.) > > http://www.nytimes.com/2012/09/08/opinion/how-pot-helps-parenting.html?_r=0 > > Beth Benoit > Granite State College > Plymouth State University > New Hampshire > > > September 7, 2012 > Pot for Parents > > By MARK WOLFE > > San Francisco > > THE youngest of my three daughters was born around the same time I became a > card-carrying medical cannabis patient. Even though I was only 44, I’d been > suffering from occasional back pain. I also suffered bouts of stress, > compounded by anxiety. The causes were unknown, but there seemed to be a > correlation with work deadlines and flying coach with three children under > the age of 5. Sometimes it got so bad I had trouble falling asleep at night, > leaving me groggy and irritable. > > So, in 2010, I resolved to seek medical help. I received a thorough physical > examination from my CannaMed doctor, who checked not only my pulse but my > blood pressure as well. Examining the results, he concluded that I would > benefit enormously from a cannabis-based treatment regimen and recommended > that I use a brownie-based form of the drug to avoid the lung irritation > associated with other modes of dose administration. I soon had in my > possession a shiny, state-sanctioned medical marijuana ID card, gaining me > free access to the city’s expanding array of quasi-legal cannabis > dispensaries. > > After two years of treatment, I can state unequivocally that I feel much > better about pretty much everything. Sure, my back still hurts, but I’m cool > with it. > > But the best part is an amazing off-label benefit I call Parental Attention > Surplus Syndrome. > > Before beginning treatment, I was a dutiful if not particularly enthusiastic > father. Workaday parental obligations were a necessary, unfortunate chore. I > was so stressed out by the end of the day that bedtime, with its interminable > pleas for more stories, songs, sips of water and potty breaks, felt like a > labor to be endured and dispatched as quickly as possible. > > Here is what a typical weekday evening exchange between me and my oldest > daughter once looked like: > > Child: Daddy, can you show me how to make a Q? > > Father: (sipping bourbon and soda, not looking up from iPad) Just make a > circle and put a little squiggle at the bottom. > > Child: No, show me! > > Father: Sweetie, not now, O.K.? Daddy’s tired. > > It’s different now: > > Child: Daddy, can you show me how to make a Q? > > Father: (getting down on the floor) Here, I’ll hold your hand while you hold > the pen and we’ll make one together. There! We made a Q! Isn’t it fantastic? > > Child: Thanks, Daddy! > > Father: Don’t you just love the shape of this pen? > > It’s the same with my middle child: > > Before: > > Child: Can I watch a video? > > Father: Of course! > > After: > > Child: Can I watch a video? > > Father: Why don’t we read a story and then pretend we’re in our own video! Go > pick out a book, and I’ll go get the finger puppets. > > I swear I am a more loving, attentive and patient father when I take my > medication as prescribed. Perhaps this isn’t surprising. As anyone who > inhaled during college can attest, cannabis enhances the ability to perceive > beauty, complexity and novelty in otherwise mundane things (grout patterns in > your bathroom floor, the Grateful Dead, Doritos), while simultaneously > locking you into a prolonged state of rapt attention. You not only notice the > subtle color variations in your cat’s fur, you stare at them in loving awe > for 20 solid minutes. > > I submit that this can be enormously salutary to the parent-toddler > relationship. Beyond food, shelter and clothing, what do small children need > most from their parents? Sustained, loving, participatory attention. Thank > you, Doctor. > > No doubt some of you are tut-tutting that I should use meditation or yoga or > Zen mindfulness to achieve this. Point taken, and if I had a full-time staff > of cooks and nannies, I’m sure I’d give all that a whirl. But the reality is > that my wife and I are raising multiple tots on modest incomes in a small > space in a very expensive city. No time for Tantra. > > And I’m not suggesting that all stressed-out fathers should just get baked. > You might even get a ticket for it in some states. And let’s not forget the > health risks, which are rumored to possibly exist. I’ve heard that even a > small amount of marijuana can impair short-term memory function. It might > also affect short-term memory function. > > But for me, at least, the benefits clearly outweigh the risks. I find the > time I spend with my children to be qualitatively different and simply more > fun when I take my medicine (always in private, never in front of them, never > too much). I am able to become a kid again, to see things through my > daughters’ eyes and experience, if I’m lucky, the wonder of each new game, > each new object and sound, as they do. > > Deeply embedded voices of authority in my head do still caution that I may be > hurting my kids in ways I can’t see. But I just can’t imagine how it could > possibly be worse for them than the consequences of their father’s former > stress-fueled frustration and withdrawal. When I’m rolling around the floor > with my giggling daughters, clicking into an easy dynamic of goofy happiness > and love, I feel it’s just what the doctor ordered. > > Mark Wolfe is an art dealer. > > > > MORE IN OPINION (1 OF 23 ARTICLES) > > Opinionator | Townies: My Night as a Billionaire > > Read More » > > Close > > --- > You are currently subscribed to tips as: [email protected]. > To unsubscribe click here: > http://fsulist.frostburg.edu/u?id=13283.28aec02f231f4c4baa9a4a58ae139710&n=T&l=tips&o=20410 > > (It may be necessary to cut and paste the above URL if the line is broken) > or send a blank email to > leave-20410-13283.28aec02f231f4c4baa9a4a58ae139...@fsulist.frostburg.edu > > > > --- > > You are currently subscribed to tips as: [email protected]. > > To unsubscribe click here: > http://fsulist.frostburg.edu/u?id=13105.b9b37cdd198e940b73969ea6ba7aaf72&n=T&l=tips&o=20412 > > (It may be necessary to cut and paste the above URL if the line is broken) > > or send a blank email to > leave-20412-13105.b9b37cdd198e940b73969ea6ba7aa...@fsulist.frostburg.edu > > > > > > > > > --- > > You are currently subscribed to tips as: [email protected]. > > To unsubscribe click here: > http://fsulist.frostburg.edu/u?id=177920.a45340211ac7929163a0216244443341&n=T&l=tips&o=20413 > > (It may be necessary to cut and paste the above URL if the line is broken) > > or send a blank email to > leave-20413-177920.a45340211ac7929163a0216244443...@fsulist.frostburg.edu > > > > --- You are currently subscribed to tips as: [email protected]. 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