Akua,
The public typically turns a blind eye when confronted with someone who
is different, disfigured or disabled - "if I don't see it, it's not
there". To air it out in the open on national television puts it right
there in their face... and it helps the curious understand a little
better the trials we go through in a way they don't have to feel
embarrassed to come right out and ask about.
While no one here disputes your right to be disappointed, hurt,
depressed and down-right angry with your situation and how you have been
treated, your constant negative perspective does nothing good to help or
inspire others to better theirs. Sniping at those who have taken their
situation and used it to put a face on 'disability' in the public's eye
sounds like nothing more than bitterness and jealousy and serves no
purpose.
["No one is shown trying to get on a bus"]... luckily for them, they
don't have to use public transportation, but on the flip side, three of
them have their own cars and are often shown getting in and out with
their w/c - without assistance.
["No one is shown... getting on or off a sidewalk without curb cuts"]...
you obviously only watched clips of the show. There have been numerous
examples of them going up & down curbs, as well as up and down steps.
["since I've never heard of ( nor probably will I ever hear) "push boys"
"]... the show has only been on since June of this year!
["i chafe against the nomenclature "push girls" -- which, despite their
affirmations, belittles and diminishes"]... you actually get that upset
about the title of the show??!
[Girlification doesn't make decision makers take your needs or your
situation seriously.]... neither does confrontation, rudeness or defiance.
I'm not trying to offend you, but I wonder sometimes from your postings
if you present the same attitude towards the people you interact with as
the one you exhibit here. If not, I apologize, but if so, I'm not
surprised at the treatment you receive. I have almost never been
confronted with anything less than courtesy, cooperation and assistance
if needed when out in the public. Most folks can spot a "chip on your
shoulder" attitude in a second and will likewise turn off. You get what
you give and unfortunately for the disabled, you often times have to
give a little more than you're used to, want to or should have to, in
order to get back.
Taking a line from one of my favorite movies (Heartbreak Ridge), "they
adapted, they overcame". I still see this show as an example of what can
be done with effort, ambition and the right attitude toward your
situation. "When life hands you lemons, make lemonade" - not vinegar!
Yeah, it may be a little homogenized and sugar-coated, as Hollywood is
wont to do, but if it were shown as stark and bleak as you paint your
life, no one would continue to watch.
On 8/9/2012 7:42 AM, [email protected] wrote:
Auti is the former dancer who crashed after selling her body for
money. She's a paraplegic.
Angela, the quadriplegic, a former model, had those stem cell
treatments in Panama ( I think) which restored she said lots of function.
She had the money to undergo this back then -- about a decade ago. I
sure wish I could afford it!
/*"Getting the able bodied population to look at the population that
uses w/c is extremely important in order to further the cause of
things we need, ie public transportation, support, access to jobs,
good medical care, etc."*/
I agree, but this show doesn't help do that. No one is shown trying to
get on a bus, (or any public transportation for that matter) or
having/trying to roll down unshoveled streets or getting to a corner
where the snow and slush is piled high so you can't cross the street
-- even if there are curb cuts.
Or getting on or off a sidewalk without curb cuts…..
Angela (the quad) did say a bit about the cost of her care in one
episode and how that was driving her to try and find a way to make
money and re-enter modeling-- not a pragmatic option for 99.9% of the
general population, never mind the disabled. And it seems her husband,
an actor, left her
I'm glad your daughter found something in it.
Even waste can be used as fertilizer. Doesn't mean it isn't dreck.
But since I've never heard of ( nor probably will I ever hear) "push
boys" , i chafe against the nomenclature "push girls" -- which,
despite their affirmations, belittles and diminishes.
Girlification doesn't make decision makers take your needs or your
situation seriously.
Akua
On Aug 9, 2012, at 9:50 AM, Mary Anne Egan wrote:
You raise some valid points....my daughter is ten she has been
paralyzed since she was an infant. We met the youngest member of this
cast and she was so excited. I appreciate that being on TV affords
liberties the rest of us do not have. But to my daughter the name
girls softens it for her to appreciate more than woman and I would
normally be the first to argue about calling a woman a girl. In her
case it is useful. As for the ability of Auti the quad, what I saw
was that she has help that gets her dressed and that she also had some
stem cell treatments in South America(?), nonetheless to me this is
all about baby steps. Getting the able bodied population to look at
the population that uses w/c is extremely important in order to
further the cause of things we need, ie public transportation,
support, access to jobs, good medical care, etc. No one would put on
a show about quads who were totally dependent for care because people
would not want to watch it. In doing it this way, many folks, who are
otherwise not exposed, are getting to see how people who use chairs,
are in fact people first. The logistics of how they present this is
always going to be "hollwood-ized" it is no different than any other
show/reality show.
I am sorry it upsets you but I do see the benefit of raising awareness
and the ability for my child to see an adult female who is happy, and
enjoying life despite the obstacles she faces, it is incredibly
empowering. My daughter has not seen the show it is too grown up, but
when she met the youngest member of the cast, she felt empowered and
we watched some bios on line. The woman talked about what a push girl
is and how it means to push through when things are tough, we have
used that many times and she gets empowered by it.
My daughter only crosses her legs by accident when her legs spasm, in
the night mostly and she is all tangled up in her cath/drainage
bag...not exactly the hollywood moment for the show!
who knows this show may enable adults in our community to be willing
to have my daughter over for a play date without being afraid. That
would be so worth it!
