Hello out there,
After a long week, I thought these entries would bring some chuckles and
provide some insights this dark Friday. Enjoy....
Murphy's Law:
If anything can go wrong, it will.
Murphy's Corollaries:
1. Nothing is as easy as it looks.
2. Everything takes longer than you think.
3. If there is a possibility of several things going wrong, the one that
will cause the
most severe damage will be the one to go wrong.
4. Whenever you set out to do something, something else must be done first.
5. Every solution breeds new problems.
6. It is impossible to make anything foolproof because fools are so
ingenious.
7. Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.
8. Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse.
Murphy's Mathematical Axiom:
For large values of one, one approaches two, for small values of two.
The extended Murphy's Law:
If a series of events can go wrong, it will do so in the worst possible
sequence.
Murphy's Comment on the Origin of Murphy's Law:
Murphy's Law was not propounded by Murphy, but by another man of the same
name.
The Reliability Principle:
The difference between the Laws of Nature and Murphy's Law is that with the
Laws of Nature you can count on things screwing up the same way every time.
Zymurgy's Law of Evolving Systems Dynamics:
Once you open a can of worms, the only way to recan them is to use a larger
can.
Borkowski's Law:
You can't guard against the arbitrary.
Allen's Law:
Almost anything is easier to get into than to get out of.
Young's Law of Inanimate Mobility:
All inanimate objects can move just enough to get in your way.
The Roman Rule:
The one who says it cannot be done should never interrupt the one who is
doing it.
Arthur's Law of Love:
The love letter you finally got the courage to send will be delayed in the
mail long enough for you to make a fool of yourself in person.
Churchill's Commentary on Man:
Man will occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of the time he will
pick himself up and continue on.
Lowe's Law:
Success always occurs in private, and failure in full public view.
Kovac's Conundrum:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal.
Christie-Davies' Theorem:
If your facts are wrong but your logic is perfect, then your conclusions are
inevitably false. Therefore, by making mistakes in your logic, you have at
least a random chance of coming to a correct conclusion.
Bralek's Rule for Success:
Trust only those who stand to lose as much as you when things go wrong.
The Rockefeller Principle:
Never do anything you wouldn't be caught dead doing.
Beach's Law:
No two identical parts are alike.
General Law:
The chaos in the universe always increases.
Richard's Complementary Rules of Ownership:
1. If you keep anything long enough, you can throw it away.
2. If you throw it away, you will need it the next day.
Second Law of Applied Confusion:
Truck deliveries that normally take one day will take five when you are
waiting for the truck.
Bitton's Postulate on State-Of-The-Art Electronics:
If you understand it, it's obsolete.
Edwards' Time/Effort Law:
Effort x Time = Constant
A. Given a large initial time to do something, the initial effort will be
small.
B. As time goes to zero, effort goes to infinity.
Jose's Axiom:
Nothing is as temporary as that which is called permanent.
Souder's Law:
Repetition does not establish validity.
Skoff's Law:
A child will not spill on a dirty floor.
Paul's Law:
You can't fall off the floor.
The Pet Principle:
No matter which side of the door the dog or cat is on, it is the wrong side.
Hutchison's Law:
If a situation requires undivided attention, it will occur simultaneously
with a compelling distraction.
Relativity For Children:
Time moves slower in a fast moving vehicle.
Zappa's Law:
There are two things on earth that are universal: Hydrogen and stupidity.
Darrow's Comment on History:
History repeats itself. That's one of the things wrong with history.
First Law of Particle Physics:
The basic building blocks of matter do not occur in nature.
Newton's Little-Known Seventh Law:
A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead.
Meadow's Maxim:
You can't push on a rope.
Kierkegaard's Observation:
Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.
Ringwald's Law of Household Geometry:
Any horizontal surface is soon piled up.
Courtois' Rule:
If people listened to themselves more often, they would talk less.
Hutchins' Law:
You can't outtalk a man who knows what he's talking about.
Ron Pickard
