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Necessity level makes good trommers out of all of us :-)
Start with some good RI (Repair of Importance), then slip easily ("..enter
positive, stay passive..") into letting "stuff" come in and at the same time
staying in the present. Rapid eye motion, eyelids flutter, huge yawns,
pictures, concepts, somatics, etc. Keep going. More RI when somatics get
too uncomfortable.
Ran out importance of Time Tubes and their basic-basic underlying compulsion
of aesthetic attraction to curves (lines and forms). Exteriorize from time
tube, created more time tubes per Dennis' instruction on handling stuck
importances.
Become aware of a Sun entity and that it had become aware of me too (in
present time). Dissociation which had previously usually been very
distinctly individuated is now blurred and I can shift in and out of VPs
(take ownership I guess one would say), for example, the Sun entity. As the
processing continues the Sun entity and/or myself felt great relief in the
realization of now able and willing to let go of a compulsive grip to "hold
it all there", meaning the solar system. Sun entity seemed to have been
stuck in some incident which also got processed, thus a mutual feeling of
now able to let go, no longer a compulsive holding planets to itself, and
the solar system no longer needs to be compulsively held onto (sorry folks,
that's life for ya!). I realized I was doing this just for myself, in terms
of effect created, and that others would continue their own holding it all
together compulsively, as they so pleased.
As I (we) let go of the solar system, I shoved the galaxy into me, then more
galaxies shoved into me and then the universe got "eaten" up too, or at
least I exteriorized from it. And guess what happened next!!! Joy, oh,
joy, there was my fellow Timebreaker in a larger aspect. We danced for joy
and happiness that I had pulled myself up and out.
Running out of time for session so decide to end off at a relative high
point. End of Session.
The E-meter shows my TA improved by one division (still too high though) but
when body holds the cans the needle does not move even though I know I am
F/N'ing. Remote meter read via another body proves this out -- I am F/N'ing
plus TA moved one division. I do not view this as a permanent state, merely
a key out from having a great session, however, losing the compulsions to
whatever extent I process them is permanent (unless I choose to bring them
back in) and that changes my life, my decisions, my ethics.
So, Pete and Harry, you are right, just keep Timebreaking. The more
importances I drop the more I see the importance of the postulate failure
cycle, knowing it.
In past practices I did get myself out of my mind and was bodhisattva-like,
and now I am correcting former errors and determined to know the Games
Matrix so that I will not once again get myself re-entangled and wondering
and bemoaning why I lost it.
Colleen
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