|
, October 28, 2004 7:32 PM
Subject: Preaching to a bear
A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a rabbi all
served as chaplains to the students of Northern Michigan University in
Marquette. They would get together two or three times a week for coffee
and to talk shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to
people isn't really that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a
bear. One thing led to another, and they decided to do a seven-day
experiment. They would each go into the woods, find a bear, and preach
to it.
A week later, they're all together to discuss the
experience.
Father O'Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on
crutches, and has various bandages, goes first. "Well," he says, in a
fine Irish brogue, "Ey wint oot into th' woods to find me a bear. Oond
when Ey fund him Ey began to rread to him from the Baltimorre
Catechism. Well, that bear wanted naught to do with' me and begun to
slap me aboot. So I quick grrabbed me holy water and, THE SAINTS BE
PRAISED, he became as gentle as a lamb. The bishop is cooming oot next
wik to give
him fierst communion und confierrmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a
wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts. In his best fire and
brimstone oratory he proclaimed, "WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we
don't sprinkle...WE DUNK! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I
began to read to him from God's HOOOOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me. I SAY NO! He wanted NOTHING to do with me So I
took HOOOLD of him and we began to rassle. We rassled down one hill, UP
another and DOWN another until we come to a crick. So I quick DUNK him
and BAPTIZE his hairy soul An' jus like you sez, he wuz gentle as a
lamb. We spent the rest of the week in fellowship, feasting on God's
HOOOOLYword."
They both look down at the rabbi, who is lying in a
hospital bed. He's in a body cast and traction, with IV's and monitors
running in and out of him. The rabbi looks up and says, "Oy! Preaching
to the bear was easy, but he got a bit touchy about the circumcision."
|
