The Remote Patrol for Wednesday, November 26-Sunday, November 30, 2008 by Thomas Allen Heald, Esquire All times Eastern, for PBS programs, check local listings ---
TOM'S TWISTED TOTALLY TRIVIAL TV THINGY Who hosted the pilot for Spy Magazine's prank series? A) Tom Cruise B) Christian Bale C) Allen Funt D) Kevin Nealon E) Will Smith The answer Monday: It was almost as if they were ...organized! === WEDNESDAY 8 p.m. Shelley Berman is rich but "PUSHING DAISIES" (ABC). Who slew the Jew...ish comedian? Robin Hood or Anna Nicole? "THE WHITE HOUSE: BEHIND CLOSED DOORS" (History) updates Jacqueline Kennedy's famed 1962 tour. Meanwhile, "MONARCHY: THE ROYAL FAMILY AT WORK" goes with Queen Elizabeth II to a garden party, and hopefully learns its lessons well. SWEEPS STUNT PARENT CASTING * Brenda Blethyn tells secrets and lies as Mother Christine on "THE NEW ADVENTURES OF OLD CHRISTINE" (CBS). * Ryan O'Neal is a good sport as Daddy "BONES" (Fox). Memo to "THE 2008 WORLD MAGIC AWARDS" (MyNetworkTV) fire whomever is keeping you on the channel that just ran a couple months of new "Magic's Greatest Secrets: Breaking the Code" Masked Magician specials ... but keep Neil Patrick Harris as your host. "ROSIE LIVE" (NBC) is a view to a kill with Liza (with an L), Ne-Yo, Alanis Morissette, Clay Aiken, Topo Gigio, Rachael Ray, Harry Connick Jr., Kathy Griffin, Gloria Estefan, and "30 Rock's" Alec Baldwin and Jane Krakowski. 10 p.m. Barbara Walters delivers the exclusive Second post election interview with "DIRTY SEXY OBAMA" (ABC). Foo Fighters become stew fighters on "TOP CHEF" (Bravo). Why does this taste like teen spirit? "SONS OF ANARCHY" (FX) sets down the kickstand on season one. Lean into the skid, y'all. A construction-crane pools and/or Schmidts on "LAW & ORDER" (NBC). I would not have thought I'd be digging the "Fear Factor's" "Saw"-esque "ESTATE OF PANIC" (Sci Fi), but I am. Now if they can get Steve Valentine to sub for Meredith Viera on "WWTBAM." NIGHT LIGHTS * Dave thinks Teri Hatcher and Ludacris are super. Thanks or asking. * Heidi Klum, Robert Pattinson and Seal are in with Jay. * Craig spends an hour in the life with Adam Arkin, Jen Kirkman, and Adele. * Ethan Hawke and Plain White T's bite reality with Conan. THURSDAY 9 a.m. The new balloons / inflated infomercials "THE 82ND MACY’S THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE" (NBC) include Horton the Elephant, "Figure With Heart" by Keith Haring, Buzz Lightyear, and Generic Smurf. 9 p.m. The liberal gotcha media pinkos at CNN think you should care about Ethiopia, children of prisoners, and New Orleans on "HEROES: AN ALL-STAR TRIBUTE." Naturally, Alicia Keys performs. Will the one mile mark in gourd catapultation be broken at "THE 22ND ANNUAL PUNKIN CHUNKIN WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS" (Science)? We shall see. Naturally, Alicia Keys performs. Kid Rock apologizes to Lynrd Skynnrd and Warren Zevon on "STORYTELLERS" (VH1). NIGHT LIGHTS * Dave guesses his mom's pie, then learns "Why We Suck" from both Denis Leary and John Mayer. * Brooke Shields and David Lynch pucker up to Craig. FRIDAY 8 a.m. Is a 22 hour marathon of "MORK & MINDY" (Sci Fi) enough to want to make you want to go stimulate the economy with money you don't have? 7 p.m. "KIDS & MONEY" (HBO) learns whether the kids are still buying pogs. 8 p.m. "EVERYBODY HATES CHRIS" loves "The Oprah Winfrey Show" circa 1987. Richard Gere goes "UNDER THE INFLUENCE WITH ELVIS MITCHELL" (TCM). 8:45 p.m. UNNECESSARY MOVIE SPIN OFF ALERT "THE PENGUINS OF MADAGASCAR" (Nickelodeon). Please, guys no WALL-E show. 9 p.m. Captain Stottlemeyer believes in miracles thanks to a fountain at a monastery. Which means that Monk will meet monks at "MONK-SMAS" (USA). 10 p.m. Gus's sister has the hots for Shawn on a "PSYCH-SMAS" (USA) involving a mall Santa from jail. John Landis directs, and naturally, Alicia Keys performs. TELE-GEBRA "Top Gear" x I-pod + "Fringe" - Mr Wizard + "The Secret Diary of a Call Girl" - "Samantha Who?" = "BRINK" (Science) NIGHT LIGHTS * Tom Arnold and Faith Hill make the case for holiday atheism with Dave. * Kristin Chenoweth and Diedrich Bader push brave and bold daisies to Craig. SATURDAY 8 p.m. You can't feel the love tonight with "MAN-EATING PRIDES" (National Geographic). 9 p.m. The Ood return on "DOCTOR WHO" (BBC America), and we all know what that means. At least this lesbian dance maniac won't sing (probably) on "ELLEN’S EVEN BIGGER REALLY BIG SHOW" (TBS). Candace Cameron Bure has to save Christmas for jolly old Tom Arnold with "MOONLIGHT & MISTLETOE" (Hallmark). 10 p.m. Liev Schreiber has caught either "SPUTNIK MANIA" (History) or the Skylab flu. "FRANK CALIENDO RUINS SCENES FROM THE FUNNIEST MOVIES OF THE YEAR: 2008" (TBS) SUNDAY 7:30 p.m. Andy Richter guests on "KING OF THE HILL" (Fox) as a scoutmaster who may have voted No on Proposition 8. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge say no more. Naturally, Alicia Keys performs. 8 p.m. Homer thinks Bart's new Muslim friend, Bashir, is a terrorist on A VERY SPECIAL "THE SIMPSONS" (Fox). Isn't that what Bart is? Priest Cesar Romero helps "THE RUNAWAY" (TCM) illegally cross the border while running from a young Lou Dobbs in a "Lost & Found" classic from1962. The fishes in the deep blue sea will enjoy "FAITH HILL: JOY TO THE WORLD: A SOUNDSTAGE SPECIAL EVENT" (CMT) Contestants make the biggest mistake ever on "THE AMAZING RACE" (CBS). Even bigger than annoying Kevin Marousek, RPCV. 9 p.m. TELE-GEBRA "24" + "Slumdog Millionaire" x "Brotherhood" - "My Two Dads" = "BRITZ" (BBC America). "42 WAYS TO KILL HITLER" (National Geographic) does not include music by Paul Simon. 10 p.m. Brad Garrett hosts "CHEECH & CHONG: ROASTED" (TBS). Dave, is not there, Man. "BRITNEY: FOR THE RECORD" (Logo and MTV) requests that you leave Ms. Spears alone. Leave her alone. 11:30 p.m. Jamie Foxx relinquishes control of "LAFFAPALOOZA" (TBS) to Tracy Morgan. The lesson: never keep a poker hand with only a 5 and a 7. === TV OR NOT TV RECOMMENDS "Encyclopedia of Television Shows, 1925 through 2007 (4 Volume Set)" by Vincent Terrace http://tinyurl.com/EncycloTV TVBarn and TVornotTV readers can't wait until the new edition of Tim Brooks and Earl Marsh's Olympiad "The Complete Directory of Prime Time Network and Cable TV Shows", but Vincent Terrace's mammoth new edition tops their book with info on 9,100 shows. You may not get the complete IMDB cast lists, but that's what IMDB is for. Not just primetime, not just daytime, pilots too. It's going to be like reading the dictionary, but I may attempt it. === TTTTTT ANSWER "Oh, the humanity! The turkeys are hitting the ground like sacks of wet cement! Not since the Hindenburg tragedy has there been anything like this!" Where is Les Nesman? The Pinedale Shopping Mall === But the conversation doesn't end here, add your own suggestions or discuss mine on the "TV or Not TV" Google list. "The Remote Patrol" is copyright© 2008 Thomas Allen Heald and Gigantic Rear Projection, Ltd. Naturally, Alicia Keys performs. --~--~---------~--~----~------------~-------~--~----~ Like TV only smarter. You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "TV or Not TV" group. To post to this group, send email to [email protected] To unsubscribe from this group, send email to [EMAIL PROTECTED] For more options, visit this group at http://groups.google.com/group/tvornottv?hl=en -~----------~----~----~----~------~----~------~--~---
