The Remote Patrol for Thursday, April 23, 2009
by Thomas Allen Heald, Esquire
All times Eastern, for PBS programs, check local listings

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TOM'S TOTALLY TWISTED TELEVISION TRIVIAL TEST THINGY
NBC is reviving "I'm a Celebrity... Get Me out of Here!" which bombed on 
ABC in 2003. Who won that edition?
A) A current contestant on "The Celebrity Apprentice"
B) The ex-wife of a "Dancing with the Stars" loser
C) The host of "Dirty Dancing: The Reality Series"
D) The host of "Make Me A Supermodel"
E) The current "Tonight Show" announcer

8 p.m.
"SMALLVILLE" (CW) has a new superhero, Stiletto, aka Lois Lane. Her 
shocking secret: she looks like a pump, but feels like a sneaker.

The "DOVE AWARDS" (Gospel Music Channel) features American Idol loser 
Chris Sligh, whom you'll remember as the American Susan Boyle.

"IN TREATMENT: PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAL" (HBO) goes behind the 
appointment book.

8:30 p.m.
Oscar nominee "TROUBLE THE WATER" (HBO) relives the carnage of Hurricane 
Katrina through the eyes of a 24 year old documentarian.

9 p.m.
I GUEST SO
"The Wire's" Idris Elba checks in for an arc at "THE OFFICE" (NBC).


9:30 p.m.
I GUEST SO II: THE CON OF  WRATH
Salma Hayek and Steve Buscemi stalk "30 Rock" (NBC)

10 p.m.
"THE BEAST" (A&E) ends season one with a cliffhanger -- Will Patrick 
Swayze still be alive for season 2?

Tom Sizemore and C. Thomas Howell are magical on "SOUTHLAND" (NBC).

There are plenty of ways that you can hurt a man and bring him to the 
ground.
You can beat him, you can cheat him, you can treat him bad, and leave him
when he's down. (Yeah.) But I'm ready, yes I'm ready for you. I'm 
standing on my own two feet. Out of the doorway the bullets rip on 
"HARPER'S ISLAND" (CBS)  repeating to the sound of the beat. Oh yeah. 
Another one bites the dust.

TALK TALK
* Jon upsets his constitution with Richard Beeman.
* Colbert has a cow with Elizabeth Bintliff.
* Tavis gets a triple word score with Ambassador Arturo Sarukhan and 
Anika Noni Rose.
* David is grateful for Jamie Foxx, Lauren Conrad, and the Dead
* Jay makes Jules Sylvester, Ryan Reynolds, and Big Bad Voodoo Daddy 
feel mighty real.
* Kimmel just can't get enough of Channing Tatum, Elisha Cuthbert, and 
Depeche Mode.
* Craig thinks Teri Hatcher and Martina McBride are super. Thanks for 
asking.
* Fallon saves the day with Ali Larter, Mike Tyson, James Toback, and 
Tinted Windows.
* Carson is pretty in pink with Eliza Dushku and Brett Dennen.

QUESTIONABLE ANSWERS
Besides Drew Carey, which cast member of the US edition of "Whose Line
Is It Anyway?" was also an executive producer? Twas none of the people I 
listed yesterday ... Ryan Styles made a splash on the the UK edition and 
when Drew made the ABC edition Styles stepped up as a executive producer.

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   "The Remote Patrol" is copyright© 2009 Thomas Allen Heald and
Gigantic Rear Projection, Ltd., a division of Haslenald, Inc. All rights
reserved.

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