Colbert accepts Olympic ombudsman position, sort of…

http://www.cbc.ca/arts/story/2009/12/04/bc-stephen-colbert-olympic-ombudsman-speedskaters.html


Late-night comedy show host Stephen Colbert appears to have accepted
an offer to attend the Olympics in Vancouver but it's not clear what
he actually plans to do once he's in B.C.

The U.S. comedian — who plays an over-the-top right-wing political
pundit on The Colbert Report — announced on his show on Thursday night
that he would accept an invitation from the City of Richmond to attend
the 2010 Winter Games. Then he said he would only come as a member of
the U.S. Olympic team.

Richmond officials extended an invitation to Colbert after he labelled
Canadians as "syrup suckers" and "ice-holes" while picking up on
complaints that Canada had limited the U.S. speedskaters' access to
the Richmond Olympic Oval.

In response the City of Richmond issued a news release Nov. 17
offering Colbert a chance to serve as "an official ombudsman to
monitor the treatment of Americans during the Games."

Colbert appeared to accept the offer, sort of, on Thursday night's show.

"I have no idea what an ombudsman is, but as long as it requires no
effort from me, I proudly accept," he told viewers.

But then he said he'd also be going as part of the U.S. team.

"I have decided to go to the Vancouver Olympics and not just to
'ombud.' If I'm going, I'm going as a member of the U.S. Olympic
Team."

Colbert also failed to don the official ombudsman's pink tuque sent to
him with the offer by Richmond.

He also failed to say if he would rise to a challenge by CBC
sportscaster Shane Foxman for a speedskating duel on the Olympic ice.

The Richmond Oval, just south of Vancouver, will be the venue for the
long track speedskating events.

Ted Townsend, a spokesman for the City of Richmond who extended the
invitation, is pleased Colbert may attend the Games, even with his
preconditions.

"He did accept the job as long as he didn't have to do any work," said Townsend.

"The ombudsman's primary responsibility will be protecting his own
interests, and anyone who watches the show will know Stephen Colbert
will have no problem with that."

Colbert has made a habit of ripping on Canada since becoming a primary
sponsor for the U.S. Speedskating program after Dutch bank DSB
declared bankruptcy and left the team with a $300,000 US shortfall.

In exchange, he put a link up on his popular website asking the public
to help the speedskating program, and Colbert says it's working.

"You came through and now this team can afford to buy its own skates
instead of renting them from the creepy old guy at the rink," Colbert
told viewers.

"Nothing can stop U.S. speedskaters now, except maybe Canadians. The
Wall Street Journal has reported that for these Olympics, Canada has
an aggressive new attitude," he said.

"According to one of the Canadian coaches, Canada is finally more
concerned with winning than being nice, hence their new Olympic
slogan, 'Own the Podium' — in contrast to their previous slogan,
'Pardon, would it trouble you if we won a medal or two? It would? OK,
never mind.'" said Colbert.

Colbert then turned back to his accusations of Canadian cheating.

"They are playing dirty," he said. "First, limiting America's training
time at the Olympic speedskating oval, so naturally, champion skater
Joey Cheek and I put them on notice and I launched a `Hey Canada,
Don't Be An Ice-Hole' letter-writing campaign."

He claimed that International Skating Union faxed him a letter stating
that the Olympic oval will be ready for on-ice training three days
earlier than previously planned.

"I am kind of surprised the Canadians responded this quickly," he
said. "Their postal beaver normally takes months to cross Manitoba."

But Colbert's tongue-in-check Canadian bashing isn't sitting well with
at least one American speedskater star.

"He's a jerk," Shani Davis said Thursday when asked for his take on
Colbert's criticism of Canucks. "You can put that in the paper."

Davis declined to elaborate, making the comment in a brief exchange
with The Canadian Press before rejecting an interview request and
walking away.

There may be some irony in Colbert's attacks on Canadians.
Lineage-tracking website Ancestry.ca claims that Colbert has two
paternal relatives a few generations back that lived, worked and even
died in Canada.

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