Never followed up on this... I'm 99% sure that this was flaky hardware
on my end.
** Changed in: dpkg (Ubuntu)
Status: New => Invalid
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https://bugs.launchpad.net/bugs/507538
Title:
package openssl 0.9.8g-16ubuntu3.1 failed to install/upgrade: unable
to create `/usr/share/doc/openssl/README.gz.dpkg-new' (while
processing `./usr/share/doc/openssl/README.gz'): Invalid argument
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