Dear Yvonne, I am glad you were not hurt and I almost feel sorry for your new neighbor. He has made a very bad start. The first impression he has left upon you, and those who can figure out who he is, by his location, is that he is an arrogant, bully with an inflated sense of entitlement and massive self control deficiencies. And, worse he exercised those characteristics upon someone who is well liked and well respected. Maybe he was having a hideous day, and maybe this was an aberrant expression of his character, but unless and until he apologizes, we will can not think the best of him.
Separately, money is only money. Better financially qualified Home Buyers translated to more money for Sellers and Agents, but not always to superior personal traits. In fact, the process of acquiring money can actually reinforce unpleasant traits. One of the sad things that I am seeing, in UC, is decent Adult-"children", of some of the established families, are unable to buy into UC. The families are sometimes being replaced not through any meritocracy but because those who can afford the homes have had more opportunities at every step of the way. My work is delightful when I get to work with a Clients who are both financially qualified and meritorious. Money can creates fences between understanding. Children grow up believing what they are taught. And if they are taught that whining, cheating, crying or bullying results in the "prize" (whether it is parking or a trophy spouse), than those behaviors will come into play. The good news is the older we get, the less tolerant we are of those behaviors and most folks are eventually socialized through peer encounters. Some, just later than others. I am glad you survived, and the neighbor reveals himself as better than his first impression and that the story becomes a comical symbol of possible change. I can remember, with a twinge of embarrassment. some of my least attractive first impressions, and was glad I was sometimes given a second chance to make a better impression. All the best in 2005! Liz On Sat, 29 Jan 2005 15:49:09 -0500 Yvonne Paterson <[EMAIL PROTECTED]> writes: > With the influx of new entrants into the neighborhood it appears I > now have as neighbors people, who have different expectations of > what > being a neighbor means. One of my neighbor tried to run me over last > > Wednesday evening! This was due to road rage - or rather "parking > rage". As you all know, after heavy snow, like we had last > weekend, > parking gets very tight and for some reason people think that if > they > dig their car out of a spot then they own the spot. On Sunday we dug > > out two spots, our car and one where our weekend visitors had > parked, > we also helped out a neighbor. When we got back home after work on > Monday. All the parkable spots on the street that had been shovelled > > (including "ours") had been taken so Milt dug the snow out of > another > spot so that we could park. When we got back to our house on > Wednesday there were several parking spots available but folks had > put trash cans and other objects in them to save them. There was a > long stretch very near our house and the spots we had dug out (now > occupied by others) that could accommodate about 3 cars. I got out > to > move the trash can in the spot nearest our house. As I was doing > this > a guy pulled up in a car and started screaming at me that it was > his > spot. I denied this and continued moving the trash can. He reversed > sharply into the spot knocking over all the other cans, aimed his > car > at me and accelerated towards me forcing me to jump into the snow > bank to avoid being hit. Milt pulled in behind him and got out of > the > car to ask him why he had tried to run over his wife! He shouted > some > invective and took off down the street disappearing into a house > several removed from ours - and from the parking spot! I was really > shaken and upset and we decided to call 911. The police officers who > > came were very sympathetic and went to his house to tell him that > it > is illegal to block the street because the city owns the street and > it is also illegal to use your car to intimidate your neighbors. > They > came back and said that he had admitted being in the wrong and we > would not have any more problems with him. We declined to press > charges.We have not received an apology. > > What is sad is that for the first time ever, Milt and I seriously > discussed moving out of the neighborhood. This is after 17 years and > > surviving the crack-cocaine epidemic, having our house burgled, our > car broken into several times and being robbed in front of our > house. > Despite all of this Milt and I always felt that our neighborhood had > > a sense of community and well-being towards one another that was > lacking elsewhere. However, the neighborhood has changed - most > think > for the better. Sure our property values have increased with the > influx of new owners but it seems to have lost the sense of > community > I so valued and that kept me dedicated to living here. I had hoped > when the neighborhood became fashionable that the kind of people who > > wanted to move here would share my general values and ideas about > what is acceptable conduct. There has been a lot of discussion on > this list serve recently about street crime. Well, this has been a > reality of life in our neighborhood for many years but somehow I > always managed to take it in my stride. I know that I have never > felt > more unsafe than when this "new neighbor" attacked me because he > was > so angry and out of control. I am still hoping that this incident is > > the exception and that we have some positive experiences with new > neighbors that off-set this extremely negative one. > > Sadly, > > yvonne - > Yvonne Paterson, Ph.D. > Professor of Microbiology > University of Pennsylvania > 323 Johnson Pavilion > 36th St. and Hamilton Walk > Philadelphia, PA 19104-6076 > Tel. (215) 898-3461 > FAX: (215) 573-4666 > http://www.med.upenn.edu/immun/Faculty/paterson.html > http://www.med.upenn.edu/micro/faculty/paterson.html ---- You are receiving this because you are subscribed to the list named "UnivCity." 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