Neighbors,

Please understand, Sam is not a big fan of the UCD or FOCP.  But as one of the 
most respected and loved leaders in the community, he understands the 
importance of leading by example.  While he can not condone the continuing 
policies and tactics of these organizations, with his abundant love, 
forgiveness, and inspiring tail; he wants to be a symbol of humanity to their 
leadership.

Sure, he has bitten his tail over secrecy, abuse of power, and the bullying 
treatment toward local environmentalists, his bipedal friends.  But Sam and I 
have been asked to volunteer our time and bring our mental skills to bear on 
the manufactured, central, historic, crisis in Clark Park and the community.  
He wants to do this for the community!  

The Crisis:   Our upscale district desperately needs an organic plan to 
organically restore the Clark park dandelions so that organic whores, drug 
addicts, and gang members can safely return to an over grown fertilized organic 
park!  

The Solution:  Sam has brilliantly solved the manufactured crisis!  The 
community will certainly love the brilliantly simple organic plan that he 
barked out.  Sam has decided to start donating his organic shit for UCD and 
FOCP leaders to collect twice each organic day.  Furthermore, he has decided to 
rally the squirrels, possums, crows, and pigeons to also donate their organic 
shit to the organic vision of the anointed, and save Clark Park with organic 
fertilizer!  (I certainly hope Sam’s FOCP membership dues and BID tax will be 
waved after such a display of generosity!  Hell, we should make him the SHCA 
President!) 

Sam believes that if organic UCD and FOCP leaders concentrate on organic shit 
collection and leave the difficult mental work of the village up to him, that 
Clark Park will have dandelions and over grown grass before the leaders can 
finish a remedial course on the principles of democracy and start mowing.

Sam may be the smartest organic leader this upscale organic village has ever 
had!

Ruff-ruff,
Sam Moyer
Report prepared by the leftist paranoid wanker, crazy Glenn

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