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Objet�: governmentium


governmentium


A major research institution has recently announced the
discovery of the heaviest chemical element yet known to
science. The new  element has been tentatively named
"Governmentium ".  

Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75
deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant deputy neutrons, giving
it an atomic mass of 312.
 
Forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities
of lepton-like particles called peons, hold these 312 particles
together.  Since governmentium has no electrons, it is inert.
However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with
which it comes into contact. A minute amount of governmentium
causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it
would normally take less than a second.
 
Governmentium has a normal half-life of 3 years; it does not
decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization during which
a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange
places. In fact, governmentium's mass will actually increase
over time, because each reorganization causes some morons
to become neutrons, forming isodopes.  This characteristic
of moron-promotion leads some scientists to speculate that
governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain
quantity in concentration.
 
 This hypothetical quantity is referred to as  "Critical Morass".
 You will know it when you see it.

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