> the division into Component/Skin isn't helping.

A typical application should not need to be concerned with this. Unless you are 
writing skins, their existence should be largely transparent to you.

> I am looking for a good design pattern.

I'd suggest looking into BXML and the Bindable interface. It allows you to 
create user interfaces using an approach similar to what you might do in MXML 
or XAML. Bindable is briefly discussed here:

http://pivot.apache.org/tutorials/bxml-primer.html

A simple example is here:

http://svn.apache.org/repos/asf/pivot/trunk/examples/src/org/apache/pivot/examples/scripting/

Take a look at JavaWindow.java and java_window.bxml for an example written in 
Java.

G

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