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Kushal Das wrote:
> Here is the next video to watch. Feel free to discus/share your 
> thoughts.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EqcuzSwySR4

I feel that way about everything, that I help people with.
While my contributions to life and people were definitely not Django
scale, I empathise keenly with Jacob, because I’ve felt *exactly* the
same emotions.

> We’ve built an industry on free labour we’ve concluded that we’d
> much rather make people workd for free in their spare time than
> fairly compensate them for their labour and get good software!

Friends have led me on for *years* where I believed I was helping them,
when I was in fact unpaid idea generator / vision executor and then felt
upset, because I wanted to be paid what I was worth at the end of four
to five years to “helping!”
It took me *years* to find clients who would pay me at least at the low
end of the scale of what I was worth!

And in a seredipitous turn of events, I just shared “F**k you, Pay me”
with Kushal, just a couple of days ago. caution, some swearing involved [2]
While what Mike suggests does not have to be the cornerstone of *all*
your negotiations, it *should* always be at the back of your mind!

Realise that power imbalance are not just sexual.
They could be monetary or emotional “fulfillment” or some other mental
model, that you are not aware of and the bloke on the other side is
exploiting.     

I thought I could “handle” it all, until stuff broke at home and then I
really flamed out

The only thing that saved me was finally being intentional.[1]
- - about life
- - and career and the work that I chose to do (even f it paid less)
- - and the people I choose to let into my life
(that touches a wide swathe. it could mean not having comments on my
blog or being willing to let a thousand twitter comments pass you by,
because you just have for the heck of it or using your contacts as the
anti contacts, so that you know who *not* to talk to. I’m not mean, but
I have only 52 more years left to live and I’ve already wasted 38.)

I get Jacob. I’m still recovering :)

PS. Final word of advice.

And be choosy.
While I know we learn faster in groups, I have no problems slogging
alone too.
The only reason I came to DGPLUG, was because I decided to trust Kushal
enough and because of the *warm* community he’s built

If you’re ever in a position, where you enjoy the work, but the people
around you are ahem crazy or do things that run counter to the way your
world works … leave!

Between work and peace of mind, always choose peace of mind.



[1]:https://janusworx.com/on-intention/
[2]:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jVkLVRt6c1U
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