2000-12-10
This article appeared today in the automobile section of the Cleveland Plain
Dealer. If you don't think it is humorous as I don't, or shows poor taste
and judgement as I do, I suggest you write to the Plain Dealer. They only
show a postal address, but if you write to the "letters to the Editor"
column ([EMAIL PROTECTED]), you will let your feelings known to the editor.
I don't know if this is a syndicated column or not, and if it is, and it
appears in your local paper, write them too.
This is another example of American Arrogance that I wrote about a few weeks
ago. Can you imagine what David must think if he sees that type of
response? Could you imagine the response David would get if he asked why
Americans don't use SI?
CLICK & CLACK
European wonders: Why do Americans trash rental cars?
By TOM and RAY MAGLIOZZI
Dear Tom and Ray: I work for a rental car company in Mons, Belgium, and most
of my customers are Americans. Here's my question: Why do so many Americans
feel obliged to clear all the garbage out of their homes and dump it into
their rental cars before they return them to us? In some cases, we could
change the engine in less time than it takes clean the interior of the car.
Another thing, the ashtray is always clean, but the carpet is covered in ash
and candy wrappers. What do Americans think the ashtray is for? Finally, is
it an American custom to hide empty cans and take-away food boxes the under
the seats? Maybe if I understood "the American way" it would make it more
acceptable for me. Any comment? -- David
Tom: Yes, David. I could see how, from a foreign perspective, this looks
like sloppy and even inconsiderate behaviour. But it is actually yet another
example of good old American ingenuity.
Ray: It's part of America's job creation program abroad. You might have
noticed that the United States always has among the lowest rates of
unemployment in the civilised world. And why, you might ask? Because we
Americans know how to make Americans know how to make work.
Tom: The Americans who rent your cars are just worried about the poor
Belgians who live in your country. What if they have no work to do? How
will they feed their families?
Ray: So, when driving a rental car, the thoughtful American is likely to
take the extra time to place an empty pizza box securely under the passenger
seat. He knows that your company will have to assign, and pay, somebody to
clean out the car and retrieve the garbage. And if lots of people place
pizza boxes under seats, the company will eventually have to hire a person
whose sole job it is to fish out empty pizza boxes.
Tom: But the American, being even more thoughtful, does not stop there. To
ensure work for more of your Belgian countrymen, he has his wife throw a
half empty yoghurt container on the floor in the back, providing work for a
carpet cleaner. Then he has his kids eat some candy bars and wipe their
hands on the seats. Voila! A Belgian upholstery cleaner can also put dinner
on the table.
Ray: And, of course, you can see how the thoughtful American - looking at it
this way - sees the use of the ashtray as taking food out of some poor
labourer's mouth. So the thoughtful American intentionally closes the
ashtray and takes the time and trouble to scatter his ashes over various
parts of the car.
Tom: As you say, you can often replace an engine in less time than it takes
to clean out car driven by an American. So we have succeeded masterfully!
Ray: And now that you understand the true nature of this international
humanitarian effort, David, I'm sure you would want me to extend my sincere
gratitude to the American people on your behalf. Consider it done, David!
Got a question about cars? Write to Click and Clack Talk Cars in care of
The Plain Dealer, 1801 Superior Ave., Cleveland, Ohio, 44114. We can't
answer your letters personally, but we the best in the column.
John
Keiner ist hoffnungsloser versklavt als derjenige, der sich irrt�mlich
glaubt frei zu sein.
There are none more hopelessly enslaved then those who falsely believe they
are free!
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)
