I got to thinking about
measurements the other day because I ran across the phrase
"seven league boots" while reading. I realized I wasn't sure
just how long that would be, so I looked it up.
Well, it turns out even the dictionary isn't too sure,
because a league means different lengths in different
countries.
Isn't that a fine kettle of fish? The whole world can't
agree on the length of a league.
The closest the dictionary comes to giving a definite
length was to state in English-speaking countries, one
league measures about three miles, which isn't too exact, so
I guess it's just as well that we don't refer to distances
in leagues much these days -- and I haven't worn my
seven-league boots in years, so I guess everything's
copacetic.
But that just started things off, and the next thing I
knew I was discovering all kinds of new/old information
about measurements -- or maybe I just forgot some of those
things when I was daydreaming in class.
For example, I was reminded it takes 2.54 centimeters to
equal an inch; handy information, since the rest of the
world is on the metric system, and we are one of the few
diehards being left behind.
But what about some of those other, less frequently used
terms? How much is a span, or a "hand," as in the horse that
stands 14 hands at the shoulder? A hand turns out to be
exactly four inches, so the horse was 56 inches tall at the
shoulder, or four-foot-eight, and a span is nine inches.
Measurements like the inch, the hand, the foot and the
yard date back to medieval times, when an English king
decided measurements had to be standardized.
No one knows who the guy was, but the inch was set as the
width of his thumb, the same with the hand, the foot --
well, that's obvious -- and the yard was the length of his
arm, fingertip to nose (and look straight ahead, please). A
mile was the distance a man could walk in a given period of
time. Apparently he tuckered out at 5,280 feet. A "stone"
was one that happened to be lying around, and turned out to
weigh 14 pounds. But the stone is only used in the United
Kingdom these days, and that's probably just as well. With
that one exception, almost all the other measurements use
these as a base.
But people soon started throwing monkey wrenches into the
system because those standards weren't exact enough.
Land surveyors decided to use a chain for measuring and
settled on one that had 100 links.
Problem was, the links were 7.92 inches long, so the
chain was 66 feet long. It didn't correlate with anything,
but at least the surveyors were happy. Newspaper writers and
editors measure things in column inches, while their
typesetters measure in terms like picas, ems (a full space)
and ens (a half space) -- but we all know how strange
newspaper folk can be.
Apothecaries (chemists, today) use minims, drams and
ounces, which smoothly translate into pints, quarts and
gallons, while for dry measures they're talking in grains
and drams, but throw in one measurement they can call all
their own.
Did you know 20 grains equal one scruple? Just think of
all those years we've been unscrupulous and didn't even know
it.
In land measures, we are confronted by rods and acres,
and while most of us know one acre equals a six hundred and
fortieth of a square mile, we don't really know how long or
wide it can be. Well, it's 160 square rods, and a rod is
five and a half yards long, if you want to figure it out.
Otherwise, just picture an acre as being a square of land
containing 46,035 square feet, which would measure a little
over 214 feet on each side -- and now you can run out and
check on whether your building lot is really a third of an
acre, like the salesman said.
Now, when we get into things like nails, we go back to
medieval times again. An eight-penny nail indicates a set
weight.
It takes eight of them to weigh as much as an old English
penny, and while there are billions of nails around, the old
English penny doesn't exist any more, except for collectors.
Buying a cord of wood for the fireplace isn't all that
complicated. Just make sure you get 128 cubic feet of wood,
or a stack measuring 1 by 8 by 16 feet.
Celebrating? You can get a magnum of champagne or even a
jeroboam, depending upon the size of your guest list.
A hogshead, however, may be a little more than the budget
can bear. It holds two standard barrels, at 31 and a half
gallons each, which would make quite a party. And if the
party is on a cruise liner, there are special measurements
there too. A fathom is six feet. Remember Mark Twain? He was
in 12 feet of water.
A nautical mile is equal to 1,000, which makes it 6,000
feet long.
Why it can't be the same as a land-based mile is anyone's
guess, but if you're going to meet someone, make sure
whether it'll be on land or sea. Otherwise, you could miss
each other entirely.
A "knot" is not a unit of speed. It IS a speed, as in
"traveling at 12 knots," which is defined as 12 nautical
miles per hour, so, if someone says "12 knots per hour,"
he's "all at sea," because he just repeated himself.
But it's time to dismiss the class -- or maybe "release"
would be a better word.
However, having found out all these things, we now know,
if that horse happened to be Sea Biscuit or Secretariat, it
would have to race eight furlongs to cover a mile.
By the way, did you notice?
Not once was the size of anything compared to a football
field.
Mike Morton
writes weekly for the Kansan.
