This is from Jack Ganssle's web site. A bit of metric play on words:


New SI units:

1.  Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi
2.  2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
3.  1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 microscope
4.  Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond
5.  Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
6.  Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong
7.  16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling
8.  Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
9.  1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
10.  Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
11.  Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line
12.  453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
13.  1 million-million microphones = 1 megaphone
14.  2 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
15.  365.25 days = 1 unicycle
16.  2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbirds
17.  52 cards = 1 decacards
18.  1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 FigNewton
19.  1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
20.  1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
21.  1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
22.  10 rations = 1 decoration
23.  100 rations = 1 C-ration
24.  2 monograms = 1 diagram
25.  4 nickels = 2 paradigms
26.  2.4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League
27.  100 Senators = Not 1 decision


Marion Moon


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