German thief killed by condom machine explosion
December 29, 2015 11:47 AM MST 
 
Don't try this at home. Or at all, really.
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Sometimes a criminal dies doing something so ridiculous that you can't help but 
chuckle a bit, despite the fact that a death is involved. When someone is hoist 
by their own petard we can take some satisfaction in the fact that the buffoon 
may no longer be able to breed, hence the popularity of the Darwin Awards. 
However, when somebody removes himself from the gene pool and in the process 
tangentially aids other people in breeding through their crime, well, that 
takes it to a whole new level.

Take the case of one German man and his buddies. They thought a vending machine 
would make for an easy target for some quick easy coin and attempted to rob it. 
Not by prying it open with a crowbar or by picking the lock or anything like 
that. No, these fellas decided to blow the machine up with explosives.

The explosion was successful -- a little too successful in fact. The man, who 
has not yet been identified, so we'll just call him the Prophylactic Pilferer, 
or PP for short, was struck by a piece of shrapnel from the explosion. The 
shrapnel, most likely from the machine itself and not one of the prophylactics, 
hit him in the head, ending his life of very low end crime.

His buddies took him to the hospital and spun a yarn about him falling down the 
stairs to explain the head wound. The hospital staff didn't buy it, because 
they can tell the difference between somebody's head being damaged on a floor 
or by a piece of flying metal.

The crime raises a few questions, like how much money could there really be in 
a condom dispenser to risk an explosion? If these kerls could afford 
explosives, why did they need a few Euros from a vending machine? And, perhaps 
most importantly, why weren't they practicing safe theft?

No condoms nor money were successfully lifted and the other two German thieves 
were arrested for the crime.

http://www.examiner.com/article/german-thief-killed-by-condom-machine-explosion

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