TNX to Bob Voelker for this satirical look at fly fishermen. Trout bums: Cast your worries away
By Randall Sumner Special to The Seattle Times
I see a lot of trout fishermen showing up on the river in a state of high anxiety. This, of course, is the state we Americans find ourselves in most of the time. Our culture is a cocktail of relentless competition mixed with stress and a touch of anger. It's the job, the kids, the stock market, the election, on and on.
I must be preaching again. I'll stop.
Trout aren't like us. They compete to live, not for more stuff. A trout doesn't want a Rolex watch. A couple of tasty stonefly nymphs in cool water will be fine.
The trout bum lesson for today is complicated, so pay attention:
THE TROUT CAN TELL IF YOU'RE TENSE.
I have personally witnessed this angling truth more than a few times. We put our gear together and charge into the river, bullwhipping the water to froth. What do the trout think of that behavior? They think, "Man, you have got to be kidding."
In other words, they don't like it at all. The trout aren't impressed with our importance or our rudeness.
So how do we leave our tension behind us? We don't. Most people like striving at this hellish pace. The trout bum, however, is just happy getting to the vertical position each morning. We're alive another day, let's not blow it.
If we can't go fishing today, let's at least think about fishing. Maybe tie a few flies or thumb through our newest fly-fishing catalog.
If you get to the water, take your time getting your gear together. Watching the water has a therapeutic value. If this doesn't decompress your worldly problems, sing. This is better if you're alone.
I discovered this singing therapy while fishing for steelhead on the Deschutes. After four days of casting like a machine, I found myself belting out a rendidion of "Heartbreak Hotel". It was just me and Elvis.
No, I didn't hook a steelhead that evening, but I did cross over for a time to the pure joy of fly-fishing.
We need to cherish and protect the time we have to fish. We need to fish more. Skip a PTA or kiddie soccer match.
This is your life, don't blow it. People may start to call you a bum, maybe even a trout bum. Just smile and keep humming.
-- ======================================================== Jimmy D. Moore - Scout Exec. BSA (Ret.)
Author - "MOON HOLLER MISFITS Fishing & Hunting Club", � Humorist, half-assed poet, and sometimes red-neck Texan.
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"Being able to read trout streams is just as valuable to a fly fisherman as the ability to read a defense is to an NFL Quarterback."
Jimmy D. Moore - � [2004]
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