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Local Press: Misyar marriage is necessary, but...

Published: Apr 13, 2010 01:51 Updated: Apr 13, 2010 01:51 

The misyar marriage has become a social necessity with the growing number of 
spinsters in our country.

We know that the tragedy of celibacy is primarily caused by the social system 
we inherited from the past.

I do not want to condemn the past but it is necessary that we keep pace with 
the modern age and its requirements, which make it imperative to educate women.

How can a woman obtain a bachelors, Master's or Ph.D., then go back to stay at 
home until she withers out?

I support misyar, which I consider a complete marriage minus certain aspects. 
It breaks the humiliating barrier of spinsterhood.

The wife may give birth to a son or a daughter, which ensures her a warm 
motherhood. From this angle, misyar marriage is a necessity and I support it. 
Unfortunately, some misyar husbands do not respect their marriage. We hear 
stories about cruel, miserly or ridiculous husbands.

The newspapers recently published a story of a man from Taif who worked in a 
security organization and tied the knot in a misyar marriage with a woman in 
her 30s from Madinah. He made it a condition for his wife not to have babies. 
He wanted a marriage with no responsibility. Four years later the woman became 
pregnant. The husband asked her to have an abortion because he was about to 
marry his cousin and he wanted to end his marriage to her without taking on the 
responsibility of any children.

A mother's instinct compelled her to keep the baby. This turned the husband 
into a monster. He began to treat her very badly, moving her from one place to 
another until they ended up living in Al-Maabadah district in Makkah. By then 
she was in her last month of pregnancy. 

When she started to have labor contractions he ran away, taking with him all 
her identification papers. She was unable to prove to the police who she was 
but she was rushed to the hospital by a Red Crescent ambulance where she gave 
birth. She then started the tedious and futile journey of looking for her 
husband. Yes to the misyar marriage...but.

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