Great job on the "12 Days" Ken ! Very creative, and it inspired me to dig my poem out that was written a couple of years ago (for the benefit of you new arrivals).
The original version is public domain, and I wrote this parody. So, Mayberry friends, you're welcome to use this in any way you'd like. 'Twas the night before Christmas and all through Mayberry This year's Santa would become legendary A picture from Otis was hung up with care By the one of the rose, which had won at the fair The children had put up the last Christmas wreath Opie and Mary Wiggins, who'd lost her front teeth And Andy, with no gun, adorned his night cap Just in case feuding families finally ended their scrap When out on the street there came a great noise Could it be Briscoe, Charlene and the Darling boys? It probably wasn't that nut named Bass It didn't sound one bit like shattering glass No snow, just a steady rain fell from the sky It had rained every day since those gypsies came by When up came a black Ford automobile With way yonder too much grease on the wheel With a skinny little driver, who still had no wife Often referred to as "Fast Gun Fife" His car barely made it, slowly moving along A mechanic named Pyle told him all that was wrong "Needs points, needs plugs, needs new wires, by gosh And she could also use a really good wash." To the Taylors driveway, he'd park right behind Mr. Tucker's big car 'cause he'd changed his mind He looked at the house and wished he could fly Then a ladder next to the house caught his eagle eye He'd climb up the ladder, yep, that was the plan It was left there by Wheeler, Aunt Bee's handy man He knew how to enter a room with such ease He'd taught Ernest T., with full amenities But on this special night, the door would not do So down the chimney the thin deputy flew He was dressed all in tan, now what could be dumber This night, I doubt he'd encounter Fred Plumber His hair Floyd had slicked down, but not a bit drippy In case fingers ran through from a fun girl named Skippy His hat held his ticket book just in case The governor's car was parked in the wrong place The bullet in his pocket was shiny and neat And if he should use it, watch out for your feet When he sang, it just kind of made you sick 'Cause he just couldn't sing - not even a lick Even an old-fashioned recitation didn't work After all, you can't make a bird go "chirp, chirp" He had not an ounce of fat which helped him hustle He could eat all the cookies, since they all went to muscle He had little time and might get in a pinch Since a tightwad named Weaver might turn into the grinch He spoke not a word, there was much work to do He still had to call Juanita and say "toodle-ooh" For Opie he left some shiny, new skates And a guitar, the kind that Lydia Crosswaite hates For Aunt Bee he left 24 canning jars More kerosene cucumbers for out-of-state cars He left his friend Andy a hat and a tie He'd never wear either, but he still had to try And when he had finished he went out the door He'd saved enough time for just one thing more To Thelma Lou's house he now had to go For a pan of her fudge and that doctor show He cranked up his car on the third or fourth try On his cycle and side car he could better rely But I heard him exclaim as he drove through the mud "Merry Christmas to all," and "nip it in the bud." _______________________________________________ WBMUTBB mailing list [email protected] http://www.mayberry.com/tagsrwc/wbmutbb/
