Old Man Kelsey here....been out of touch for a while. Went down in the
woods and found some funny lookin' plants...leaves kinda star shaped. When I
walked closer to look see what they was, why the Police come a'runnin' up
and slapped handcuffs on me and hauled me off to jail!! Said I was a'growin'
an illegal plant and they said it was merry wanna?? Sumpin like that
anyways. I told them I ain't got no idee what they was a'yakkin' over cause I
ain't never seed none of it before.
Well, they said they was gonna go back down there and pull up all the
plants and use it as evidence agin' me in court, but when they got there, there
won't nary a plant in sight!! Whoever was growin' it had come got it and
gone!! Anyway, they said they guessed I was a'tellin' the truth and let me
go, and even give me a ride back to my driveway. As I was a'walkin' back to
the house, this feller come runnin' outta the bushes and handed me a
envelope and said that was fer all the trubble they put me through, then he
turnt and run back thru the woods and was gone!! When I got back to the house
and set myself down in the old rocker on the porch, I looked out over my
woods and they sure looked purty!! Then I opened the envelope and found they
had stuck ten of them fifty dollar bills in thar!!! Goodness sakes alive!!
Whatever that stuff was it sure musta been high priced!! Think I'll take
that money and buy some more shotgun shells and a few more cans of Spam and
Po'k and Beans. Mebbe a loaf of that store bought bread so's I ain't gotta
fix my own biskits.
Anyway, y'all have a good day and if you decide to plant any more of them
weeds, go somewheres else!!
Old Man Kelsey down in the woods.
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