March 18, 2010

Texas Explains Decision on History Textbooks

Official Statement from Texas State Board of Education

AUSTIN, TX (The Borowitz Report) – Attempting to explain its controversial 
decision to revamp its history textbooks, The Texas State Board of Education 
issued an official statement today.

The one-sentence statement reads as follows: “If you were the state responsible 
for George W. Bush being elected President, you’d throw out your history books, 
too.”

In other news, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi said it had been difficult to get 
Republicans to vote for health care because of a “tactical error” by President 
Obama: “He should have called it ‘gun care.’”

Elsewhere, employment numbers were up, largely due to the government’s decision 
to start counting people working on Farmville
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