Betty, This is a very powerful story. I encourage all to read it.
Thank you Betty, Ejiku On Thu, Jan 31, 2013 at 4:29 PM, betty wuzu <[email protected]> wrote: > Hi there, > > Hope you are all doing well by the grace of God. > I know many of you have read this or know the story before, but you could > just re-read it. > All the best. > > [image: MARRIED OR NOT, YOU SHOULD READ THIS ... “When I got home that > night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I’ve got > something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the > hurt in her eyes. Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to > let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic > calmly. She didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me > softly, why? I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away > the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t > talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had > happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory > answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just > pitied her! With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which > stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. > She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten > years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her > wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said > for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which > was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of > release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed > to be firmer and clearer now. The next day, I came back home very late and > found her writing something at the table. I didn’t have supper but went > straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an > eventful day with Jane. When I woke up, she was still there at the table > writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again. In the > morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want anything from > me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She requested that in > that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her > reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s time and she didn’t > want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. This was agreeable to me. But > she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into > out bridal room on our wedding day. She requested that every day for the > month’s duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever > morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together > bearable I accepted her odd request. I told Jane about my wife’s divorce > conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what > tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully. My > wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was > explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both > appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his > arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting > room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She > closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I > nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went > to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. On the second > day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could > smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at this > woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. > There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage > had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her. > On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy > returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On > the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing > again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the > month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. She was > choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but > could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown > bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason > why I could carry her more easily. Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so > much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and > touched her head. Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to > carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become > an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer > and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might > change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking > from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand > surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was > just like our wedding day. But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the > last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son > had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our > life lacked intimacy. I drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly > without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my > mind…I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, > Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore. She looked at me, astonished, and > then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand > off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce. My marriage life was > boring probably because she and I didn’t value the details of our lives, > not because we didn’t love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I > carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until > death do us apart. Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap > and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and > drove away. At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers > for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and > wrote, I’ll carry you out every morning until death do us apart. That > evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up > stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been fighting > CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that > she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative > reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.— At least, > in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband…. The small details of your > lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the > car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive > for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be > your spouse’s friend and do those little things for each other that build > intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! If you don’t share this, nothing > will happen to you. If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of > life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to > success when they gave up. ♥ Remember love is the richest of all treasures. > Without it there is nothing; and with it there is everything. Love never > perishes , even if the bones of a lover are ground fine like powder. Just > as the perfume of sandalwood does not leave it, even if it is completely > ground up, similarly the basis of love is the soul, and it is > indestructible and therefore eternal. Beauty can be destroyed , but not > love. ♥ SHARE THIS POST AFTER > READING]<http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10151368552559483&set=a.79119654482.73539.47893254482&type=1&ref=nf> > > “When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and > said, I’ve got something to tell you. She sa...t down and ate quietly. > Again I observed the hurt in her eyes. > > Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know > what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly. She > didn’t seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why? > > I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks > and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn’t talk to each > other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to > our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had > lost my heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I just pitied her! > > With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated > that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company. She > glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten > years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her > wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said > for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which > was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of > release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed > to be firmer and clearer now. > > The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something > at the table. I didn’t have supper but went straight to sleep and fell > asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane. When > I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so > I turned over and was asleep again. > > In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn’t want > anything from me, but needed a month’s notice before the divorce. She > requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life > as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month’s > time and she didn’t want to disrupt him with our broken marriage. > > This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to > recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day. She > requested that every day for the month’s duration I carry her out of our > bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just > to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request. > > I told Jane about my wife’s divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and > thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face > the divorce, she said scornfully. > > My wife and I hadn’t had any body contact since my divorce intention was > explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both > appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his > arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting > room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She > closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell our son about the divorce. I > nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went > to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office. > > On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my > chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn’t > looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not > young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! > Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had > done to her. > > On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy > returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me. On > the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing > again. I didn’t tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the > month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger. > > She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few > dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses > have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was > the reason why I could carry her more easily. > > Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her > heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head. > > Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. > To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential > part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him > tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind > at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, > through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck > softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding > day. > > But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her > in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held > her tightly and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life lacked intimacy. I > drove to office…. jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I > was afraid any delay would make me change my mind…I walked upstairs. Jane > opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce > anymore. > > She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a > fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t > divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn’t > value the details of our lives, not because we didn’t love each other > anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding > day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart. Jane seemed to > suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and > burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away. At the floral shop on > the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me > what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll carry you out every > morning until death do us apart. > > That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I > run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -dead. My wife had been > fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She > knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever > negative reaction from our son, in case we push through with the divorce.At > least, in the eyes of our son—- I’m a loving husband…. > > The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. > It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These > create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in > themselves. > > So find time to be your spouse’s friend and do those little things for > each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! > > If you don’t share this, nothing will happen to you. > > If you do, you just might save a marriage. Many of life’s failures are > people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave > up. ♥ > > Remember love is the richest of all treasures. Without it there is > nothing; and with it there is everything. Love never perishes , even if the > bones of a lover are ground fine like powder. Just as the perfume of > sandalwood does not leave it, even if it is completely ground up, similarly > the basis of love is the soul, and it is indestructible and therefore > eternal. Beauty can be destroyed , but not love. ♥ > > SHARE THIS POST AFTER READINGS > > Betty Wuzu > Adoption and Foster Care Officer/Child Helpline Counselor > Action For Children > P.O.BOX 25417 Kampala-Uganda > Plot 110, Lutaaya Drive - Bukoto > Mobile +256 772 305 966/701 234 405 > Office number +256 414 541 111 > Every Child is my Child. > > > _______________________________________________ > WestNileNet mailing list > [email protected] > http://orion.kym.net/mailman/listinfo/westnilenet > > WestNileNet is generously hosted by INFOCOM http://www.infocom.co.ug/ > > The above comments and data are owned by whoever posted them (including > attachments if any). The List's Host is not responsible for them in any way. > _______________________________________________ > >
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