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I have broke it!
The Jessie image comes with an Apache which is not properly configured. Namely it is missing the config to process php files via Zend PHP 5.x.
The qunit jobs have a small smoke test that hit Special:Blankpage which gives us:
+ curl --include http://localhost:9412/jenkins-mwext-qunit-jessie-4113/index.php/Special:BlankPage <?php /** * This is the main web entry point for MediaWiki. *
Definitely confirming that Apache is serving raw php files.
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To: hashar
Cc: TerraCodes, Luke081515, Jay8g, thiemowmde, Jonas, hashar, KartikMistry, Nikerabbit, Paladox, Amire80, Aklapper, D3r1ck01, Izno, Wikidata-bugs, aude, Arrbee, Mbch331, greg
Cc: TerraCodes, Luke081515, Jay8g, thiemowmde, Jonas, hashar, KartikMistry, Nikerabbit, Paladox, Amire80, Aklapper, D3r1ck01, Izno, Wikidata-bugs, aude, Arrbee, Mbch331, greg
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