Thanks to all of you! It really matters to know that I will be welcome if I back and it matters that people who matters to me think that I made an impact to them and to the movement.
I was unprepared on Amir's mail and I reacted on it emotionally. After that I realized which kind of emails I could get :) While reading your emails, I got once more drive to stay. However, that didn't solve my motivation problem and there is no sense to stay without it solved. I am not going to find another movement. When you felt the best one, everything else doesn't have a lot of sense. Besides that, I would have the same kind of lack of motivation, or probably worse one. The problem with my motivation is exclusively my personal issue. Events in the movement influenced that, but the main portion is related to my inner issues and I am now quite confident what the reason is, which corresponds with the second part of 2011. There is another thing produced by your answers. Since this morning I am able to imagine myself back, which I wasn't able for months. I feel freed and able to think that I need a period of time off to be capable to back. I was thinking yesterday that I need serious reconsideration of my inner drives, that I need different life to fix my problems. Now I think that I even have the cure. So, will be back sooner than I was thinking. I suppose that it will be about months rather than years. (And I feel now a bit as a drama queen and attention whore, as nobody would notice even a half of year without my input.) I am professionally connected to MediaWiki. Thus, I won't be able to disappear, even it was about my feelings from yesterday. I am reading news on Portal:Current events and I am occasionally editing English Wikipedia. I noted Sara's and Manuel's emails about what they are doing. Please, connect with others who are doing similar things! Partial efforts are always much less effective. (Sarah, connect with MF-Warburg, he will continue my work in relation to mapping languages. Manuel, connect with Sanja from WM RS.) I am subscribed to so many public Wikimedia lists, that it would require considerable effort to unsubscribe from all of them. Fortunatelly, I am using a separate account for those lists. I will not delete but forget it for the time I will need to remotivate myself. And to repeat: I will always be happy to help to any of you. Feel free to contact me. _______________________________________________ Wikimedia-l mailing list Wikimediaemail@example.com Unsubscribe: https://lists.wikimedia.org/mailman/listinfo/wikimedia-l