Hmmm, completely stymied : not even this works ...
% !TeX Program=XeLaTeX
\documentclass[a4paper]{article}
\usepackage{fontspec}
\usepackage[para]{footmisc}
\begin{document}
\message {\meaning \discretionary}
\footnote{XXXXXXXXXXXXXX just a few normal words to fill up the line
up to my x x x hy\discretionary {-}{}{}phe\discretionary
{-}{}{}na\discretionary {-}{}{}te\discretionary {-}{}{}me }
\end{document}
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