Chris,  If you've only practiced for 3 years and already don't know exactly
what you're doing, you're making very good progress.  It takes many people 5
or 10 years before they finally reach the critical point where they give up
trying to know.  Some never reach that point and live their entire lives
cursed with knowing everything there is to know about zen.

As for the question on posture: Breathing freely is what's important.
 Posture is only important in as much as it does not impede breathing and is
comfortable.  Just find a posture that feels right and allows your breaths
to flow in and out effortlessly.  As always I recommend you find a teacher. 
In lieu of that, ZEN MIND, BEGINNERS MIND is as good a book as any and
better than most.  Use it as a starting point and experiment from there to
find a posture that most benefits you.

Good luck - and congratulations again for not knowing.

.Bill!

 

Chris wrote:

Hello. I may have been a member here before, but I can't remember. I 
just started practicing Zazen again. I practiced everyday for about 3 
years and then off and on for the last two. I'm still not sure exactly 
what I'm doing. I realize that posture is very important and I had a 
question about that. In Zen Mind, Beginners Mind it says that you 
should push the head up and the abdomen down as if one were supporting 
the sky, but when I do this it feels all wrong. I guess what my 
question is in Zazen is it right to hold onself in a certain posture?



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