scroll to the very very end
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> It's Hell to be Old
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>OLD
people have problems that you
haven't even considered yet!  An 85-year-old man was requested by his Doctor for
a sperm count as part of his physical exam. The doctor gave the man a jar and
said, 'Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow.'  The next day
the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar,
which was as clean and empty as on the previous day. The doctor asked what
happened and the man explained, 'Well, Doc, it's like this -- first I tried
with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still
nothing. 'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then
with her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth
in, then with her teeth out, still nothing.
> 'We even called up Arlene, the lady
next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit, and she
even tried squeezin' it between her knees, but still nothing.' 
>The doctor was
shocked!   ...'You asked your neighbour?
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>'The
old man replied, 'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.'
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