From: Rev. Harvey Sodaiho Hilbert 

Good Afternoon All,

The Seventh Grave Precept is interesting as it really speaks to the weight of 
our judgements and our willingness to identify with others. Sometimes it is 
translated as "Do not elevate yourself above others."  I have also seen it as 
"Do not elevate yourself above others by putting others down." Soto Shu 
translates it simply as "Do not be too proud to praise others."  I like this 
last version.  It really gets to the heart of the matter.

How often do we offer words of praise and encouragement to others without 
referencing ourselves in the sentance?  Often, our measure is our measure of 
ourselves.  When we find ourselves lacking how can we offer praise to others 
without feeling diminished ourselves? 

When we are able to identify with others, that is, see others as ourselves, it 
is far easier to offer encouragement and words of praise. To do this we must be 
willing to see without our small minds.  We must see clearly and without 
distortion. 

On the other side, we should realize negative criticism is rarely helpful.  It 
is small salve to our ego, to speak of another's faults and thus puff ourselves 
up. 

A modern business book, The One Minute Manager, offers helpful advice with 
this. The auther suggests that we couch a critique in between two positive 
statements.  I go one step farther and suggest the critique be offered as a 
suggestion rather than a statement.  Like so:

"I love the placement of the pictures you have chosen. I wonder if we could do 
this in this other way? By the way you're really demonstrating a great deal of 
talent with this project!" 

The point is this: we are human beings in a social environment.  We develop 
within this environment. Encouragement is like fertilizer in the soil. A good 
bodhisattva gardener uses it wisely.

Be well,
   


Rev. Sodaiho
___
Visit us at: http://www.daihoji.org

Daihoji Zen Temple
5 Arrow Road
Cloudcroft, NM 88317


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Current Book Discussion: Appreciate Your Life by Taizan Maezumi Roshi 
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